It gets better?
 

I posted in Current Events about a series of videos being made to help gay kids realize that they are not alone and that once they get out of the confinment of school where they have no choice of classmates, it gets better.

And I was reminded that 10% of people are gay.

Hmm.

We have one openly gay and a few questioning/bi posters here. Out of thousands. Fair enough, probably not a very gay friendly forum....

But what about our kids? more than 10 of us have children, but no-one posts about their worries/concerns/happiness that their child is/appears to be gay.

Taboo much?

I have three kids. Both boys have done girly things, the girl did all boy stuff until about a year ago. I don't give a shit if any one of them is gay, but I'd hate it if they felt they needed to hide it from me. Would i talk about it on the Cellar? No, I have to admit, probably not, because there's still so much prejudice and nastiness and their peers are way better at interwebs searching than I am at being anonymous.

That sucks.

I think this is a pretty damn gay-friendly forum. I also have 3 kids, and couldn't give a crap if they were gay. As long as they are happy, then I am happy for them.

So you were reminded that only 10% are gay. So what. Sharing that video is actually helping non-gay people to understand this situation better. I appreciated it. Tolerance is a very rare commodity it seems and anything that helps to promote it is a very good thing.

One thing that video did was make me wonder if my stepsons ever do any bullying. It reminds me that I need to be vigilant in that regard too.

That's cool, Pico, but why has no-one ever posted about their gay child and their concerns about that? It seems from the videos I saw that many parents need time to come to terms with a gay child. People post here all the time about things they need to "come to terms with" -many -IMO- have issues way, way worse that maybe not having grandchildren....but no-one posts about gay kids. It just seems odd when you look at the stats (forgive me, I'm a math nerd)

I think Gustav the stick bug might have been gay.

He seemed so happy.

I've never posted about my gay child . . . 'cause I don't have any. No gay family members even. Out of the 8 grandkids . . . no signs of wee feyness yet. As you might surmise, it wouldn't upset me either.

Sorry monster - all I have are gay friends & family members. Thy are all fine and talk little about any bullying or BS because of their sexual preference. We do however discuss sports, cars, bosses who are assholes and that kinda stuff.
<shrug>

You, or any member, could post here as "anonymous".

how exactly does that work, btw?

Oh fuck you all, I quit being a bleeding heart liberal

thank you; no one gave me the secret decoder ring

Log out, and log in as anonymous. I'll PM you the password, as we don't want non-members spamming us.

thanks bruce - better idea

Ahhh, I see what you are saying.

Monster, I've actually mentioned my suspicions about my stepson before. But I've always felt that it's not my place to be as open online about them as I am about my own kids (hence no pictures, etc.) Not really anything to come to grips with anyway, from my perspective.

Thats my situation too. If I had my own, however, I dont think I would want to discuss it here.

Right. No Talkee about it. But if all was well with the world, we should feel Ok to talk about it here, right? Even about our discomfort etc?

Yeah, if all was right with the world.

Has anyone here ever talked about their kid being bullied in general? We hear about good stuff and medical bad stuff, but does anyone normally share 'other bad' stuff? Its just not normally done.

eta: Im not saying being gay is the "bad" stuff.

Elspode talked once about his son's (stepson's?) problems with bullies, but it was more in terms of how he was bringing the hammer down on the school to take care of the problem (and as I recall, they did.)

Yes, i think they do share "bad stuff" -I recall theft from parents, estrangement, driving whilst impaired, inability to look after offspring, autism, brain damage, aspergers, depression, bipolar disorder (when does the 'medical " tag kick in?)...

I guess I haven't been here long enough.

or not reading everything... you probably have a life and sometimes people who need to talk about stuff don't give it a topic heading that reflects the true nature of their issue.

I know I've talked at length about bad things that've happened to me from time to time. Lots of people post day to day bad stuff in the What's Upsetting You thread.

I don't know about the 10% of people being gay thing though. I'd be interested to know where that figure comes from. More like 1%. I know two out of a class of just over 200 who graduated high school with me are gay. (Funny thing is, they were formal - prom - partners)

Yeah, I think 10% is a fake number that's been repeated for a long time. I think it's closer to 2-3%. But I'm not going to bother looking for links to support that because I think it doesn't matter.

I haven't talked about my kids being gay because I've seen no signs of it. Neither of them is very sexual at this point, but what little there is points to traditional roles. I would have no problem with either or both of them being gay. I want them to be well adjusted, independent, and happy people when they grow up. Emphasis on the independent. I want them to move out and support themselves when they grow up. Even better, support me.

I hung out with the theatre people in college, and based on my experiences, 50% of people are gay.

http://cellar.org/2007/tonyjoe-b.jpg
UT and Joe, in 1985, handling DJ duties for a dance event.

(1985)

UT: Joe, you're pretty much a theatre guy, huh?
Joe: Yes, I love doing lighting design and set work.
UT: And you're a freshman and I'm a senior, right?
Joe: Yes, for the purposes of exposition, that's the case.
UT: And you're boldly heterosexual.
Joe: I love the womenfolk.
UT: So listen to me: you don't know it yet, but by the time you're a senior, half of your friends will turn out to be gay.
Joe: What! You're kidding, right?
UT: No. Now you just remember what I said. Half of them.

(1988)

Joe: Hey you were right. That was the most amazing prediction ever.

Hahahahahhaahah @ UT. Love the pic.

not that it matters...
Then another ...

Do the bisexuals get counted twice?

The 1 in 10 does seem to be a little hard to believe. Hey, I wasn't chastising anyone for not talking about it, I was expressing regret that I'm not even terribly sure that I'd talk about it. Sorry if that wasn't very clear.

I'm torn thinking about this as well. I don't know if I would - Thats more their business than mine, but my "kids" are much older. In fact they aren't really kids anymore.

PHFEW! That's a relief. I have something to tell you....:p: J/K

I know that my oldest, a college sophomore did some girl/girl stuff when she was in 7th grade. When in highschool, she joined the GSA (gay-straight alliance). She's never introduced anyone, male or female, as her boy/girlfriend. I've asked her if she's gay, and she's told me that she doesn't know. I have the feeling that she'd date a boy if she were asked out by one, but i'm not certain. I've never posted about it because it doesn't matter to me. In the same way, I've never posted about the color of her hair, either.

WTF? You can't just drop that here and leave out all the important details...
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What color is her hair?

Drapes or carpet?

Yeah thats it too...its more or less just a combination of character traits, albeit ones that can get them singled out for bullying.

I sincerely hope you don't know the answer to both.

I don't.

Thanks guys, my creepy meter just pegged and now the needle is bent.

Do you need to talk about your bent needle? anonymously, of course?

He probably bent it sticking it in the ground to clean it.

I reckon.

"I love my dead gay son." :cry:


--Heathers

I honestly think 1 of my 2nd cousins is gay, he's 8 so I could be wrong. I have thought it for awhile, and recently he got in trouble for kissing another boy. His aunt has decided he's a sexual pervert and won't let him alone with her two boys. Its very sad to me, that side of my family is very intolerant. His same aunt said that she would kill her son if he "turned out that way."
His mother is a druggie bitch, his dad is abusive. He is currently living with his g-ma (my aunt), and the mom and dad are supposed to be out of the picture. The mom though has been let back many many times before, so I don't believe she is gone for good. The dad is fighting in court for custody or something, although he is $55,000 behind in child support. He has an older brother and younger sister, they're all with my aunt. She doesn't have the energy, health or money to properly care for them.