What to, uh, do.
 

My neighbor's dog just shit pretty much right on my front porch step. I'm thinking of putting it in a bag and giving it to my neighbor. I'm also thinking of picking it up with a shovel, and throwing it on his porch. I'm also thinking of hitting the little 'Jack Russell/some kind of weiner dog' with said shovel. Now I'm sure my cat, Slick, prolly goes in his yard, and he prolly leaves little kitty feetprints on the neighbor's car, but is that a proper trade for a two pound pile of shit on my front step?

Would it be 'neighborly' to take said pile of doggy do and, oh...I don't know...say...put it under the front seat of his car? It's been 95-100 degrees for the last couple weeks.

I think since your own pet is free to wander, and you really have no idea how it might be pissing off your neighbors, you should suck it up and clean up the shit. If you actually do hit the dog (I don't think you will), then you're an asshole.
Free range pets piss me off, unless you live on enough land that they don't bother the neighbors and are safe.

Unless the neighbor walked his dog over to your stoop expressly for elimination purposes, I say bad karma to revenge the neighbors. Threefold, ya know?

also, laffing at "kitty feetprints"!

It's not the dog's fault, he's just a dog. YOU go shit on the neighbor's porch. That'll show 'em. ;)

Yeah, if your kitteh walks on your neighbors car and your neighbor doesn't hurt your kitty, count your blessings. Many people would think nothing of hurting your cat for such a "horrible" thing (some of us probably know people like that.)

I'd clean it up and move on, like jinx said. If it happens again, I'd explain the problem to the neighbor.

One does not equal the other. Suck it up. Your cat probably pisses in their mulch leaves dead birds and other shit on their stoop...

Let it go. :hedfone:

That is some mighty shitting little Jack Russell! :eek:

ew.

Use the inside out bagging technique and tie it to the dog's collar so he can take it home.

Nah, I wouldn't actually hurt the lil fukker...but a man can dream. And he won't come anywhere near me, instead of doing something really bad, I throw water on him. Harmless, gets rid of the dog, and hopefully drives the neighbors a little batty wondering how the dog keeps coming home dripping wet.

I've never seen Slick over there, he pretty much stays in the yard unless he chases after an interloping kitteh. I'm sure he probably goes over there, though the neighbor has never said anything, (and he's the kind that would), that's kinda why I never actually do anything about the landmines in my yard, I guess.

But, on my front porch step?? Come on!!!

It's the doggeh version of the Welcome Wagon.

I live somewhere where the norm is to let cats roam, but all dogs must be controlled. Any dog left to wander the streets is immediately deemed a stray. So I have little sympathy with your neighbour and do not see the dog/ cat situation as equal. Also no cat I know would poop anywhere near as public as a porch!

I understand that you've taken back your statement about walloping the dog (I understand, I posted about killing a rude butcher like a pig the other day) but honestly, it's not the dog's fault. Your first step should be to speak to the owners. It might be acceptable to let dogs run free there, I don't know. But poop on the poch is unreasonable, and after all dogs can be trained. I would expect owners to walk their dog at some after feeding, and collect any resulting faeces in bags for disposal. Again, YMMV, but to me it's part of being a responsible owner.

And, yes, Diz has a litter tray, so I get to be all holier-than-thou.

My loathing for dogs grows almost daily, I think perhaps I should just refrain from posting in this thread.

And now he shits on your porch...

How's that working out for you? :rolleyes:

We had new neighbors move in a couple of years ago. The bastards have bunch of those little yappy dogs I hate. Rather than have the dogs use the backyard and have to clean it, they would let them out the front door so they could run out in the desert. No real problem except they would literally run right up by my front window to shit before running to the desert. This happened every single time they let them out for a couple weeks.

That ended when waited by the front door when the neighbor got home. He let his dogs out and they beelined straight to my yard. I opened my front door and let my pissed off 90 lb boxer go after them. He chased them all the way up to the mountain before coming back. Those dogs have never come anywhere near my yard since.

The probability that this dog laid that turd on your step is 20%.

It was old man Clemmons.

How about the Grumpy Old Men solution?

"Your cat shat on my porch again last night."

"Who says you can't train a cat?"

The little doggy, as well as my Slick, are both pretty much indoor pets. Neither are what you'd call 'free-ranging'. Slick kinda comes in and out as he pleases, the doggy gets put out on a lead sometimes during the day, while the neighbors are at work. They let him out periodically to "do his do". Then he comes to see ol' Gravdigr.

I think he and the squirrels are in cahoots to give me a hard time.

That's a nice, plump corn-fed squirrel you got there. Fry him up in cornmeal batter!

If you're going to be putting it in a bag anyway, might as well leave it on the neighbor's front porch, set fire to it, ring the doorbell and run, as it the tradition amongst our peoples.

Maybe you could try getting some of that pheremone spray and just do your porch and perimiter. That might stop further incursions.

We got a new puppy a few weeks ago. We're in the process of 'potty training' her.

I hate dog shit.

That's what happens when you feed them.

GOOD LORD! Again with the pictures! Will you look at the size of that thing hanging of the backside in that picture!!!! What the hell kind of fetish do you have Gravdigr?

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Ok, just kidding. Your front step? I'd leave it where it is, go get the owner, not the maker, and tell him his dog left it there and you expect him to collect it. You might have a bag handy or you might suggest when you're at his door that he bring gloves, your call.

I think this will be an effective, if more labor intensive and less satisfying solution than what our Hall of Fame founding member lookout123 has offered. Hell, it might even be worth asking him if you could borrow his dog.

Your front step? Un-fucking-acceptable.

And when the owner says, my little puppy didn't make that 2 pound pile?

I thought Griff had the best idea , hurts no dog or person and takes the offending pile back where it belongs. Dogs are the mental equivalent of a 3-6 year old human child. I can never understand people thinking they have the ability to be malicious in their potty habits [unless it is to their owner] ;)


>someone who is glad to live on a 200 acre farm where cows and dogs can poop in the woods and no one bitches about it ....

:biglaugha


Dude, you should see some of the mounds that little dog climbs down off of. I don't see how he keeps from passing out...:eek:

I'm actually pretty amazed that your neighbor allows his little guys to run free in the dessert. Isn't he worried about coyotes or eagles eating them?

All you need to do is convince the offending dog that some other dog left that deucer on your porch, and he'll eat it clean up.

Ha! That just might work, he's dumb enough.