Restaurants should have 2nd helpings
 

Everybody is looking for ways to cut down. So they divide the meal up into 3rds, and give you two-thirds up front. The waiter comes around and asks "Would you like a second helping?" and they either bring you the last 3rd, or you can order dessert or whatever. Instead of putting the last 3rd into a box, taking it home, and throwing it away two days later. Plus, getting a second helping makes it seem more like a home-cooked meal.

But what do they do with the other third if you don't eat it - serve it to the next customer?

It's been done.

1. Old Country Buffet

2. Shrimp Fest at Red Lobster

They are wrong to call them shrimp.... they are jumbo sea monkeys.

The waiters will be working more and the kitchen staff will be working more all to save a little food, which is the smallest cost of a meal eaten out. Penny wise and pound foolish.

Oh I forgot to mention the best part where I punch glatt in the face.

you're a cuckoo

There was a comedian on Dr Katz Professional Therapist once, who said he'd go out to dinner with his parents and his dad would be freaking out "DON'T EAT THE BREAD. THAT'S HOW THEY GET YOU." The guy was like (I'm paraphrasing): what, so I eat some bread and can't finish my steak, what, are they in the back sewing leftover steaks together? Bread is all part of a grand scheme to keep you from finishing your meal so they can use it again?

But that's how they get you. ;)

OMG to this day I randomly say to people "Don't eat the bread--THAT'S HOW THEY GET YA!" serisouly

I do too! Only one other person I know gets the reference: my ex. :)

The only other person I shared this joke with is dead.

Now you've done it. I'm going to have to start ordering them like that.

See they Got him!

You can't spend too much time inside my head.

My head is full of pop culture references. It's scary, in a very sad way. ;)

Lucky you. All I've got is a headful of really obscure shit that when used in conversation confuses people.

(I used "anathema" in a sentence at a party, I think it was to describe Budweiser, since I was into my third Samuel Smith's Imperial Stout. I eventually had to distill it down to "really, really bad thing."

I'm diggin this thread.

do go on

I once scared away a Friday Freshman by using the word "mercurial".
I also like "cogent" and "elucidate". :alien:

I'm fond of orthogonal and symmetric (I get to use those reasonably often in programming). I also like anecdotal and statistical anomaly. (stats related)

When all else fails, I try to use the word poop in a sentence. I just like the way it sounds.

Not the way it smells? :turd:

made my day.

For a while I was stuck on everything being incongruent. Also, many things are ubiquitous, or ostensibly something. My coversations frequently include things that subsequently happened (although I could probably just have said "then" something happened). I noticed recently that I've been using the word homogenous to describe a certain aspect of proper aesthetics that most people probably refer to as being "balanced" (although I'm not sure this covers the full spectrum of this application of homogenous).

When people ask me, what's up? I simply reply: A direction away from the focus of the local gravitational field.

My counsellor told me I use words she has never heard before. I thought and thought and thought about what they might be. I came up with obsequious and disingenuous. There may have been more.

People should read more.

What? She's never heard, "Fuk off you wench! You're not helping!"

;)