The Cellar - May 12, 2008: Permission Granted

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- - May 12, 2008: Permission Granted (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=17235)

xoxoxoBruce

05-12-2008 10:17 PM

May 12, 2008: Permission Granted

From the time you're out of diapers, until you're very old, there are very few times it's acceptable to crap yourself.
This is one of those times. ;)

http://cellar.org/2008/ephant1.jpg
http://cellar.org/2008/ephant2.jpg

jinx	05-12-2008 10:21 PM

Look how freakin' big that elephant is! The car comes up to it's knee...

lumberjim

05-12-2008 11:10 PM

1 Attachment(s)

laser moniker to the rescue!

Cloud

05-12-2008 11:23 PM

note the pink tipped "fifth leg"

must be in must.

now I'm REALLY scared for them!

Undertoad

05-12-2008 11:33 PM

O, that's what they're looking at. They're not scared... those are expressions of amazement

xoxoxoBruce

05-12-2008 11:38 PM

Big Bull already took a crap, and now he's ready for love.

Cloud

05-12-2008 11:44 PM

LOL! the expression on the woman's face is so much funnier now.

And, I've just scarred myself for life by googling images of elephant peni.

either that, or I'm feeling strangely excited . . .

classicman

05-13-2008 12:02 AM

HA A HA HA HA @ cloud!

xoxoxoBruce

05-13-2008 01:26 AM

The result....
http://cellar.org/2008/babyelephant.jpg

dar512

05-13-2008 09:06 AM

Yeah, those elephant VWs are great. Lotta room in the trunk. :D

Slothboy

05-13-2008 11:35 AM

Thread.... too funny....

losing... bladder control...

Gravdigr

05-13-2008 01:45 PM

Uh...Can't a Rabbit outrun an elephant? I'd damn sure be finding out!

Heheh, the dude looks to be feeling somewhat "inadequate" right now.:p

Never a white mouse around when you need one.

sweetwater

05-13-2008 01:52 PM

Maybe the woman isn't frightened at all ~ she just got a whiff of the fresh elephant droppings.

DucksNuts

05-13-2008 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Undertoad (Post 453161)

O, that's what they're looking at. They're not scared... those are expressions of amazement

I'd be freaking scared, not amazed. Thats a scary schlong!!

Bruce - I want one of those!!!

monster

05-13-2008 08:30 PM

I think he's about to "Fuel" the car. What's the capacity of the tank in those things?

footfootfoot

05-13-2008 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dar512 (Post 453224)

Yeah, those elephant VWs are great. Lotta room in the trunk. :D

smiled out loud!

Leah	05-13-2008 10:28 PM

Bruce I love the end result photo very cute, but honestly what stupid people they are, that elephant could probably out run their car anyway, why get so close.?????? Stupid stupid stupid people.:headshake

Cloud

05-13-2008 10:33 PM

not to mention the other person.

the one who took the picture.

xoxoxoBruce

05-13-2008 10:35 PM

Maybe the picture was taken by another elephant.

Cloud

05-13-2008 10:37 PM

with a TRUNK CAM! LOL! that's what the elephants are really doing with those cameras--filming elephant porn!

these two are obviously perverts. into humanality.

newtimer

05-14-2008 12:01 AM

The woman is holding her nose because her driver, as recommended in the title, just crapped his pants.

Elspode

05-14-2008 12:27 AM

Elephant spunk...the new biofuel!

You can trust your truck to a great big pachyderm fuck!

I gotta agree about the shocked expressions, though. I think they're less worried about what he's doing to the car with his fore trunk than they are with what he might be about to do with his aft trunk.

xoxoxoBruce

05-14-2008 01:30 AM

I don't know, but I'd be a mite more concerned that the roof was buckling. :eek:

Scriveyn

05-14-2008 01:30 AM

1 Attachment(s)

Canned food? Testing the vacuum seal?

Recipes anyone?

dar512

05-14-2008 09:09 AM

Forget the metric system, I think we've just invented the elephant measurement system.

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster (Post 453393)

I think he's about to "Fuel" the car. What's the capacity of the tank in those things?

About 3 espunks

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gravdigr (Post 453302)

Uh...Can't a Rabbit outrun an elephant? I'd damn sure be finding out!

Depending on the species, rabbits are about 4500 esph whereas elephants are about 2500 esph. esph = elephant schlongs per hour

See. Much more understandable than metric.

xoxoxoBruce

05-16-2008 11:59 PM

OK, here's the story in the Telegraph.

Quote:

"In front of us was a safari vehicle with tourists," said the 27-year-old.

"My sister and I drove in our Golf behind them. We saw a group of elephants and started taking photos when we saw the elephant head our way.

"A game ranger shouted that I must turn the car off, which I did."

Mr Beltrame then thought that the elephant would walk past them.

Instead, it seemingly decided to take a closer look at the occupants of the car.

"We got very scared when he stood by us and put his foot on the hood of the car," Mr Beltrame added.

"We waited about five or six minutes, sitting without moving, waiting, before the elephant continued walking. "It was an unbelievable experience."

Keith Marallich from Far and Wild Safaris said the photo was taken by one of their British clients.

According to Ms Renette van der Merwe, regional manager of Budget rent-a-car, who Beltrame rented the car from, the damage cost about R7000 to repair the car.

Gravdigr

05-17-2008 03:46 PM

LMAO---"elephant schlongs per hour":rotflol: :lol2:

Undertoad

05-17-2008 04:11 PM

"OK look. I have here the original bill of rental for the vehicle, and on the list of dings and dents most certainly does not include a crushed roof with an elephant's footprint on it."

--

"Editor? Yes thanks for taking that, uh, certain special paragraph out of my story. Yes, in retrospect the bit about the penis doesn't really improve the piece. I know, we don't want to shock the safari tourists. I understand the couple has been given free dry-cleaning by the hotel."

Grismar

05-20-2008 09:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster (Post 453393)

I think he's about to "Fuel" the car. What's the capacity of the tank in those things?

About 45 liters - a little under 12 gallons - going by several online auctions of ca. 1980 VW Golf models. A single squeeze of the ... ahem ... fuel pump, when properly stimulated, would yield only about 40 milliliters of seminal fluid. Check here si-pddr.si.edu/dspace/bitstream/10088/318/1/Hildebrandt2000.pdf . So, you'd have to 'give this guy a hand' about 11,250 times before you've filled her up. And that's assuming his seminal vesicles (the glands that produce the fluids) are working overtime to keep up.

As far as recipe ideas go: shark fin soup anyone?

http://d3.biggestmenu.com/00/00/7d/f...20697fcb_m.jpg

Gravdigr

05-20-2008 02:30 PM

An elephant tried fucking a Rabbit
But he found that he just couldn't jab it
After checking for cops
He ripped off the top
And with the tourists, he finally went at it

or

An elephant tried fucking a Rabbit
But he found that he just couldn't jab it
In his quest for some snatch
He ripped off the hatch
And found he finally could stab it

Sheldonrs

05-20-2008 02:43 PM

It's either a case of Auto-erotica or that elephant will hump anything with a trunk.

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