Wombat combat
 

I saw this line:
In UG's serious post about rememberance day, and I wondered, do wombats actually fight? I've never heard of it. Any help, Ducks? Aliantha (or Mr Antha?)
I'm an outdoorsy Aussie, and I've seen wombats active around dusk when (I'm) coming back from hikes. It was early morning for them, but they never seemed even remotely combative. Docile, rather.

It got me thinking about a new thread: strange animal fights.

Kangaroos definitely fight; theres a great video here (with cameo appearances by Mad Max in a golf cart and the worlds 3rd wost golfer).

It's not easy to fight when you're most notable feature is your super-long neck, but giraffes make good use of them here. LOL at this.

Koalas are notoriously grouchy buggers too.

So what other animals fight in a comic or amusing manner? Please, nothing that has been set up by humans, no dogfights or cockfights. Just natural, preferably non-lethal, humorously clumsy argy-bargy.

And do wombats fight?

you tube is packed with bear vs lion etc.

the best was the monkey with the tiger cubs....i think steve dallas posted that already though

Hippos are ruthless towards each other. I think they are evil.

Edit: I think UG meant to type "womprats" not "wombats." The womp rats of Beggars Canyon are really nasty. Once they clamp down on something, they don't let go.

My boys play fight all the time. No fur ever flies though. Cats are buggers for territorial fights - I've seen some pretty grim injuries in my time, I'm grateful that the worst weren't to any of my cats.

They're racketing up and down the stairs as I'm typing. What makes me laugh is the skidding sound of claws on the laminate flooring downstairs.

Back OT - chimpanzees are pretty brutal too. They will sometimes steal a chimp baby and batter it bloody in the treetops and eat it.

Wombats are known - in most cases - to be particularly aggressive animals and can be highly territorial. Both male and female wombats are known to guard their grazing patches and in times of drought will fight to defend their territory.

Ohhhh....poor little Fuddles! He's so cute. I want a wombat.

They're pretty stinky animals you know Dana. lol

That's the thing with the marsupials. They all look so cuddly and friendly, but they really are wild animals. The only thing they don't do that other wild animals do is kill you. ;)

I wonder if that's why they evolved and thrived in the comparatively isolated and people-free environment of Australia? In Europe they would all have been made into pets and then wiped out when they showed their true colours!

"Wombats" I wrote and wombats I meant. I swiped the line from a science fiction author -- I think it was either Gordon R. Dickson, or somebody who said he and Gordy used to fight like wombats...

The line does not appear in Charles Fort Never Mentioned Wombats.

There was also one of those rurally-humorous books Australia seems to abound with, or else sells more of to tourists than even Army slouch hats, titled Wombat Revenge. I haven't got it around any more, having lent it and then moved away, but I remember it describes being bitten by a wombat -- after a rather improbable chain of circumstances. They have strong jaws and blunt teeth, and the whole thing amounted to a rather severe example of, "Ow. OW! Quit it!!"

Thank you Ali! : doffs cap in your general direction :
Poor Fuddles. It was so sweet that he came back to the humans for help.
I still wonder how wombats fight. I guess "tooth and nail" to judge by Fuddles' injuries.

Slightly related: I was thinking about this last night and I noticed that the only animals to have horns are herbivores. Can anyone think of any counter-examples? Horned carnivores?
I guess the reason being that carnivores already have fearsome teeth and claws and these easily develop into fighting weapons (if they aren't already). Herbivores need to keep their teeth suitable for eating plants and so have to find some other means of fighting: horns, antlers, etc.
Anyone care to shoot down this made up theory?

You could do a phd on that topic Zen.

Nearest thing to a horned carnivore I can think of is the norwhal, and that's more a tusk. There are plenty of protectively clad carnivores, from the croc's scutes to a lion's mane.

Arthropods are a whole 'nother game, and perhaps should be left to another topic. There aren't any vegetarian spiders, if I understand rightly.

Zen, does your theory take into account the dinosaurs? I know next to nothing about them, but it's the only thing that came to mind when I read your question. :) I wouldn't know a T-rex from a pterodactyl (sp?), so it's just an idea. I'm no expert on any animal that doesn't live in my house, so it might be a far-fetched counter.

Good theory, though!

Hell no. I already have one, and that feels like enough.
Besides, then I'd have to do a whole heap of science. You know, facts. Research. Hard work. Sod that.

Besides, academia being what it is, I'm sure somebody has already done it.

Regarding dinosaurs, IIRC the horned spiky ones, triceratops, stegasaurus, were herbivores.

Not sure what to do with Narwhals. It's kind of a giant tooth, but they couldn't use it for eating.

Ooooh...Dr ZenGum. What was your subject for your phd?

Oh and wild boars also have tusks and they're carnivors.

I think they're omnivores. And I'm not sure about tusks in general - should they be viewed as big teeth, consistent with being a carnivore? Or as horns-growing-in-a-funny-place, consistent with a being herbivore?
Boar's tusks seem to fit the former, but elephant's tusks seem to fit the latter.
hmmmmmmmmmm.


I might also need to consider the predator/scavenger difference. Do boars actually hunt? or just scavenge?

Haven't you ever watched Razorback?

It was in philosophy, not the European post-modernist type but the Anglo-American proto-science type.

I was looking at the relationship between the scientific third-person description of the events inside human heads (including physics, chemistry, psychology, cognitive science, etc) and the subjective, first-person conscious experience of those events (ooohhh, BLUE!).
Roughly, the concepts we use to describe the events in scientific terms, and the concepts we use to recognize those events by means of conscious introspection, refer to the same things, but do so by different means and are conceptually independent of each other.

No, actually :headshake

Tell me, was that reviewed in Nature by any chance :p ? Next you'll be citing Black Sheep to prove that sheep are predators too. ;)

Ok, they hunt. If you say so. I didn't know, that's all.

It's just a movie. I don't know if they actually hunt. Probably not.

Don't back down now! You'd just convinced me!

I recall wild pigs being cited as a factor in the demise of the dodo. Maybe this was hunting of adult birds, maybe it was more eating of eggs.

Can any of the hunting-inclined cellarites help us? Mercenary? Zippy? UG?

OK, here's something for you. My father used to go hunting wild pigs out west. If you bothered a bore it'd chase you down. I don't know if you'd call that hunting, but it's pretty close.

They definitely do eat meat. Omnivorous would be the right term though.

My brother owns 140 acres up Wombat Hill. When the dogs corner them, they just duck their head into their tummy and leave their backs exposed...they are like rocks when they do that.

Kill ya....hell yeah, the little bastards will flip a small car if hit when crossing the road.

My Aunty had 2 pet Wombats, Rosie and Gup....they were great, but when they got grumpy they just used my run at you flat out and knock your legs out from under you.

A Koala took off half the skin on my leg one nite, I decided to try and rescue it off the road....ungrateful little fucker went mad...squealing and tearing me to shreds.

If they piss on ya tent or car...it reeks of eucalyptus for weeks.

I've heard stories of Roo's drowning dogs in dams....the dogs swim out to get the roo and it just holds them under the water with the front paws.

Wild Pigs are the devil!!

I had a colleague whose dog was drowned by a 'roo in exactly this manner.

I've also heard how wombats defend themselves from dingoes. They lie head inwards in their burrow, presenting their hard, fat-padded rump to the dog. When the dingo get frustrated with snapping at the wombat's bum, it tries to climb over them and get at the head... at which point the wombat simply stands up and crushes the dingo against the roof of the burrow. I don't know if this is true but I like it.

For a country with no major predators (except Crocs in the north) we've got some bloody surly, grouchy herbivores.

Which leads us to "The Song of Marsupial Fandom." In full:

The Ballad of Marsupial/Monotremal Fandom
by Denny Lien, Al Kuhfeld, Erwin S. Strauss
(To "The Temperance Union Song")
These verses came from "The HopSFA Hymnal."

We're coming, we're coming, our strange little band.
Adoring marsupials, we do take our stand.
We do not like reptiles because we do think
That once you like reptiles you must love a skink!

CHORUS: Hooray, hooray for kangaroos,
For kangaroos,
For kangaroos!
Hooray, hooray for kangaroos!
That's the song of Marsupial Fandom!

We do not bug wombats 'cause wombats bug back.
And no one can live through a wombat attack.
Oh, can you imagine a gorier scene
Than bugging a wombat until he turns mean? CHORUS.

Tasmanian devils are mean as can be.
They'll gladly bite you and they'll gladly bite me.
Can you imagine a gorier sight
Than Tasmanian devils a'spoilin' to fight? CHORUS.

The furry koala is gentler than these,
He doesn't bite people, he just climbs in trees.
Oh, can you imagine a scene with less grief
Than a koala turning over a new leaf? CHORUS.

We're coming, we're coming our strange little band.
Adoring marsupials, we do take our stand.
We also like monotremes, but feel a song
About them would only be two verses long.

SECOND CHORUS: Hooray, hooray for platypi,
For platypi,
For platypi,
Hooray, hooray for platypi,
That's the song of Monotremal Fandom!

We're coming, we're coming, our odd little band.
Adoring the monotremes we take our stand.
We don't like placentals 'cause tell us we beg:
How can someone born live ever be a good egg? SECOND CHORUS.

God stepped on the bill of the poor platypus.
That's how he came to have so flat a puss.
Oh, who can imagine how sad to be stuck
With a rear like a beaver and front like a duck.

Don't try to pet the tough spine'd echidna. (n.b.: pron. SPY-ned.)
If you don't mind, he' rather you did nae'.
Oh, can you imagine a scene more tranquil
Than an echnida op'ning up an anthill? SECOND CHORUS. (pron. OAP-ning)

We're coming, we're coming, our odd little band.
Adoring the monotremes we take our stand.
We'd sing evening long of monotremal lore,
But must end our song 'cause there ain't any more. SECOND CHORUS.

Vicious Pig - (not) off the rails.

So now the signs should read:
"Look both ways for trains .. and wild boar."

Wild boars playing choo-choo... what will those clever Japanese come up with next?

The boar probably wasn't really wild ... it was obviously very well trained.

... and here, you can still see its tracks...

From the ABC:


Twenty minutes to fight off a wombat?? I'm beginning to think US-style gun laws might not be such a bad idea after all. :shotgun:

Wombats are sturdy critters. But I guess you have to be Steve Irwin, on whom light perpetual shine, to dance with wombats.

Did you see that dude on the news last night? lol The interview was pretty funny. He didn't seem like a smart fella.