Marriage question for guys
 

Kind of a weird question, I guess: if you are married and share a bank account with your wife, how would you react to coming home and finding your wife waiting to seduce you, wearing new, expensive (and very sexy) lingerie? Would you be happy that she wanted to excite you, or annoyed that she spent money on something frivolous without discussing it with you?

Depends on how expensive, depends on how much of the account she spent and how much she put in there.
I would worry it after. Priorities.
Frivolous is stretching it, again, priorities.

I think it depends on circumstances. If I've lain awake worrying about how we're going to pay the bills and avoid filing for bankruptcy and I come home with that on my mind, it would certainly be different than if I don't have any financial worries.

not a guy, but problems like this could possibly avoided by good communication, a good budget, and a good idea of how much discretionary money is available.

From a woman's standpoint, if I set up a whole sexy lingerie seduction scene, and all my husband could think of was that I spent money on it, I would
a) be crushed
b) be furious
c) think there's something seriously wrong with my marriage

I don't think this can be answered without more details & context, but in general I would say IMO neither spouse should have to discuss small/routine purchases with the other. The exact definitions of "small" and "routine" are going to be different from couple to couple depending on their situations.

If you're going to say "very expensive," then I assume it's an amount that probably needs some discussion. I personally wouldn't give my wife a gift that cost so much that the expense would bother her, but sometimes this can be a gray area. Would she like to have a 52" LCD television? You better believe it. But I'm pretty sure she'd be too hung up on the price to really enjoy it. So I'd say it's definitely possible to buy an outfit that, however sexy, costs too much to be comfortable.

Edit: Just to point out the obvious, that Cloud said "sexy".. not "expensive."

well, yeah, because if I were the woman, that's what I'd be thinking about.

Wife: I'm being sexy!

Husband: I can't get it up if we're in the poorhouse!

Wife: Poorhouse? You're in the doghouse, buster!

Just remember - naked is free.

I can tell you, in our current situation, if I spent $50 on a bunch of flowers she would be pissed... just pissed... only pissed and would be correct to be.
If my feelings were hurt by it I would be an idiot for it.
Romance is free, spending money we don't have to spend would be foolish and would have nothing to do with how much she cares about me or how romantic she is or feels toward me.
If the situation were turned around, I would get laid and then have it out.
Money and romance have nothing to do with each other.
If we were flush and she just focused on the cash, then I would say it is a problem she has, perhaps OCD, and needs to be looked at.

Sexy lingerie is distracting. I probably wouldn't even put a dollar figure to it until the next day after my sex hangover wore off. Pretty woman. Sexy underwear. Nothing else exists.

Come on now Hime, a roll of Saran Wrap isn't that expensive...

On a more genuine note: cheaper lingerie is more comfortable, easier to remove, and just as sexy IMHO.

This is really what we are looking for anyway.

And we don't feel bad about ripping off either one of these.

but, nothing, saran wrap, or cheaper lingerie may not make her feel sexy.

blah, blah, blah...when will you women learn that sex is not about what you want.

;)

On the other hand, if you contribute and feel that you are spending your own money... time to get your own account.
Personally, it is what I would do. Solves the problem, then he would have nothing to complain about from now on.

Hime is starting to sound like me with ol' lingerie questions....not good. Turn back now Hime!! Save yourseeelllfff!

;)

Ha Ha! He didn't ask you to return it immediately did he?!?


I think I recently took over a whole thread with this type of scenario.

OK, she spends money for something that is (let's face it) really for her husband and there is even a thought given to whether it was a good use of the money? I don't get it. As long as it wasn't money needed to feed the kids then who cares?

Enjoy life and don't look for things to cause friction in the relationship.

Thanks, Lookout. I asked this question of my husband and he gave an almost identical response. :D

Hmmm...I read Hime's post again....I'm thinking Hime may have bought a *little more* than just lingerie........
:)

I think it is important for us to see the aforementioned Hime in this alleged lingerie before a true judgment can be made.

If a wife buys sexy lingerie to wear for her husband, then it's a gift to him, but it's loaded so there are considerations.

From my own personal experience, my husband has never ever ever complained about money I spend on lingerie that i purchase for him to take off. He doesn't complain about any of the money I spend though, so I guess I'm lucky in that way. I can tell he really likes it when I spend money on something sexy though. There are a number of signs. ;)

needs more context.....

is she a double-bagger?



:lol:

My hubby wouldn't have any idea of the cost until the credit card bill came, so option (a) would apply. If he noticed at all. :p

I'd be outraged and rip it right off her.

and then give her a good spanking just to prove your point?

Depends on a few things... Like...

1. How much money do you make
2. Do you really give a shit... that she bought it...
3. Just how horny are you
4. Just how horny is she
5. Is it easy to take off
6. Quality and quantity of the... you know...
7. How much money does she make
8. Is she hot looking
9. Is she not hot looking
10. You didn't just masturbate
11. Whatever else sounds good to make things better.

:D

Oh...."for guys"........sorry.....oopsy.

It really falls back on the kind of budget you are on. I have found that most relationships have one of each kind of person, one is a spender, the other is a saver. Somehow you balance each other out.

So back to the original question, I might be pissed if our discretionary spending account was only $50 a month and she spend $75 for a one nighter. As someone else said it all comes down to communication IMHO. But hey on the other had if money is not a big deal, well hell have at it babe. I usually spend around $300 give or take on my wife at Victoria's Secret for Christmas. I encourage her to shop for that stuff when ever she feels like she needs to. The other factor has to do with what type of romantic relationship you have with your SO, but that is another subject altogether.