What is the whiniest, most horrible song EVER?
 

Right now:

Grenade by Bruno Mars

"and you tossed it in the trash
and you tossed it in the trash"

"wah wah wah no melody wah wah
cry cry cry monotone notes wah wah wah"

Seasons in the Sun.

Die already!

Anything by Celine Dion. No, that's not the name of a song.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart...
But the very next day, you gave it away...

Blah, blah, angsty love, blah blah.

I was gonna say that

Please Forgive Me by Bryan Adams

GAWD he sucks.

And I'm not anti-Canadian. I'm in love with Ed Robertson. ;)

I'm not anti Canadian. Some of my best friends know Canadians.

(screeching whine) How am I supposed to live without you? (cry sniffle snort)
(renew screeching whine) after I've been lovin' you so longgggggggggggggggggggggg? (boohoo)

'Cause, Michael Boltons sucks worse even than Celine and Bryan.

Second Chance by Shinedown.

WHINY, but not horrible.

terrible video.

hot chick

i'm torn


the chorus is haunting, but the rest of the song kind of wanders

That one about not being picked for teams in basketball and sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring. Whine whine whine.
It always makes me think "How're going to get a date if you don't go out and meet ppl, huh?"

Okay, this literally made me giggle out loud!

I think I'll have to nominate MacArthur Park

MacArthur Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!

Oh, no?

OH, NO! :eek:

:greenface

*chuckles* at limey
Do you mean At Seventeen by Janis Ian?

Lol jill!

Oh no, indeed!

Wicked Game by Chis Isaak : whiniest singing out there..

nooooooiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeedontwannafallinlovewithyouoooooo

I like the song though....:blush:.

OH where is my MacArthur Park story? I know I posted it here once...

Found it!

I wait with baked breath, footfootfoot!

Love Hurts by Nazareth.

Really good when you've just broken up with someone and you're drunk and alone though. Turn it up to full volume and piss the neighbours off.

Don't forget to sing along!

Oh, that reminds of....fuck what was that song, from this one time that me and J split up...a Cher song. Great break-up tune, any other time awful. That's gonna drive me mad. Gotta google.

I (don't) got you babe?

Nope. I got it. I googled its ass: 'If I could Turn back Time' !

Really? Isn't that one where she's on the ship with the huge phallic symbol? lol

I never thought of that one as whiney. Probably because it's up tempo.

Oh it's horrible. And so whiny.

Here look:
So whiny. So, so whiny.

Oh yeah, the lyrics are pretty sad. I knew that. lol

I take it back. It was the teacher who was baked! Holy smokes.

Oh GAWD yes Infinite Monkey. Cheeeeeezus, what a song! It also pissed me off because at 17 you know NUFFINK and think you know it all and wah wah wah

Oh good one!

I like Cher. I think she was wonderful in some of her movies: Moonstruck, Silkwood, Mask...but if she never opened her mouth to sing another song I wouldn't miss it.

She sounds like when you have to clear your throat 'cause there's like a bubble in it: like Kermit the Frog on voice lessons.

Diary by Bread is pretty whiny, but that was the times. There was also a song about giving your love a cherry or something.

I found her diary underneath a tree.
and started reading about me.
The words began stick and tears to flow.
Her meaning now was clear to see.
The love she'd waited for was someone else not me
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.


Why the fuck was her diary underneath a tree? Was she homeless? Is the image supposed to invoke a fairyland where people floated around and wrote diaries in tree-dotted meadows, with butterflies and rainbows, where happy little bunnies hopped around bringing ribbons of gold?

They were going to call it "She's just not that into you" but they weren't sure that had lasting value, like diaries under trees.

He found her diary under a tree when it fell out of her pocket while he was dragging her into the grave he just dug. You need to listen to all the lyrics.

And then there she is saying "I learned the truth at seventeen ..." so obviously she's older now and she still doesn't get that at 17 you know NUFFINK and think you know it all and wah wah wah. O h m y G A W D, I wish, how I wish I'd not been prompted to remember that song. Cheeeeeeeeeeeezuss. H. Christ.
Thanks guys.

OMG I'm laughing so hard right now. That is a close friend's most loathed songs ever, btw. She'd be laughing her butt off, too, if she read this post. I may have to send it to her!

Okay, treading on the toes of many British brides and grooms here (they are common first dance songs):

Whiney [sic] Houston's I Will Always Love You - argh! Give my Dolly Parton every day.


The Righteous Brothers' Unchained Melody - droney rather than whiney but it needs to be chained up! I even prefer The Goons' version!


Bryan Adams' Everything I Do - again more droney than whiny but I usually have a decent tolerance for the Canuck moptop. This was just so tedious I was hoping Middle of the Road would become roadkill.

Bwahahahahaha! If Jill hadn't instructed me to read all the way through before posting, I would've posted that song!

Send away. My humor is meant for the masses, beyond the Cellar. I'm waiting to be discovered. ;)

Bwahahaha! If I hadn't been instructed to read the entire thread before posting, I would have posted the same song as infinite monkey. Jill is right that I hate that song! She knows me too well.

Agreed, Sundae, Dolly over Whitney anyday. I like whitney myself, but it's a little like don mclean instead of roy orbison doing Crying. I mean, come on, it's roy orbison! :)

Hahahahahaa...I love it!

*waves at Grace*

Michael Jackson's Heal the World.

Hey there Grace *waves at Grace* Nice to meetcha.

Can I just put forward another entry: this time it's not that it's the whiniest song, so much as the creepiest song. 'Every Breath You Take' by The Police. Stalky song.

But that's why I love it! Because it is an obsessive stalker song, and intended to be.
I was gutted when it was turned into the "I'll Be Missing You" saccharine bleurgh.
From the sinister to the tooth-decay.

But Sting apparently LIKED it?!
I think he was scared if he said otherwise, faux ganstas would shoot up his house while he was having tantric sex.
The cowardly Geordie shite.

Bri is still in the lead with Seasons in the Sun, and post #2 BTW.

Who died and left you in charge of the sappiest song? Have you not HEARD that Bruno Mars travesty?

:lol:

FIELD OF 64?

I just rediscovered Seasons in the Sun a few weeks ago. I actually put it on the iPod. It really took me back to my early childhood. It occupies the same pigeon hole in my brain as Billy Don't Be a Hero.

Yeah yeah, for me Billy Don't Be a Hero shares that space with The Night Chicago Died.

non-edit to add, Yes, I Actually Do Enjoy Being Old.

Interesting thing about Billy Don't Be A Hero is that it's performed by two different bands, and each made it a hit. It hit number one in the UK by one band, and before they could get their act together to release the single in the US, a band in the US recorded it and released it here, and it hit number one here. So when you talk about the original number one hit Billy Don't Be a Hero, the folks in the UK and the US are thinking of two different versions.

omg, but I heard The Night Chicago Died on an old compilation CD and I cranked it in my car, roof down...it was pretty FUN!

Brandy, you're a fine girl...is another one that gets me singing along.

I like those old ones that aren't all sappy crappy why don't you love me boo hoo stuff.

OMG GLATT

I did not know that! But after looking it up, this explains the "Billy" and "Night Chicago Died" connection...

because in Britain they were done by the same band, Paper Lace, and even released on the same album.

But anyway, they're also all part of one same category, which is "60s-70s hit singles in which a major character in the song dies."

Billy, Don't Be a Hero (who dies: Billy)
Casey Jones (who dies: Casey Jones)
Leader of the Pack (who dies: Jimmy, apparently the Leader of the Pack)
Run, Joey, Run (who dies: in an ironic twist, not Joey, but his preggers whore girlfriend)
The Night Chicago Died (who dies: hoodlum gang members, a hundred cops... but not dad!)
Indian Reservation (who dies: Cherokee people, Cherokee tribe)
Seasons in the Sun (who dies: singer, listener)

But they really crossed over the line when the animals started to get it:

Wildfire (who dies: Wildfire; and, you might have missed it, Wildfire's owner)
Shannon (who dies: Shannon; and the lyrics don't say it, but they are about a dog)

But it wasn't enough to get just the animals, oh no, they had to get the imaginary mythical creatures too.

Puff, the Magic Dragon (who dies: Puff, the Magic Dragon. Honest.)

I gotta say, the night ChiCAHHHHHGo died is more about the life of the cop who made it back.

And Wildfire makes me freaking cry, you meanie weanie. I don't know who Shannon is.

And the little cartoon of Puff makes me cry.

Cry cry cry.

:lol:

For me, the only pigeon hole for "Billy" and "Seasons" is "Songs I remember well from my early childhood and haven't heard often since then."

Another one of those is "Thunder Island." Although I was older then.

im: edited!

Now you've done it. You've reminded me of the really bad song Timothy

Hahahahhaa. That's better!

See, I can't help myself...that beat of The Night Chicago Died...gives me dancy legs. :p:

Pete, don't think I've heard Timothy.

Now, ballads could be considered sappy, but who doesn't like The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald? I get chicken skin whenever I hear it.

There is sap that makes me vomit, sap that I like, sap that I am indifferent to, sap that elevates me. I think it's all in the quality of the sap.

Have we had that banshee wail from The Bodyguard yet?


AIIiiiiAAAIiiiiiiiiAAAAiiiii ... willl allllwaaaayyyiiyyyss luuuurrrvveee youououuooooouuuuuuu!!!!!1

It was banned in lots of places due to its content.