Stupid People
 

Stupid people are all around us. They're annoying but can be fun to laugh at, or at least, laugh about. So share your stupid people stories here!


Here's mine, from today:
I was hurrying to the subway, and got in the elevator, which is the quickest route from street level to the concourse. Two other people got in at the same time. One stood near the control buttons and diligently pushed the "up" button.
Folks, we were on the street level. Trying to get to the subway. SUB - way. Duh.
The light flashed and went off.
So she pushed it again.
She pushed the button three &%$#ing times!
Finally her friend said something to her and she pushed the "down" button, and away we went.
As soon as the doors opened I scooted out. I don't want anyone like that in my way, they might forget to breathe and fall down or something.
Okay, only mildly stupid, but threads have to start somewhere.

yeah--stupid people are everywhere. it's easy to put people down for being dumb. It's one of my failings. But I've learned the hard way that intelligence is only one measure of a man and does not equal worth.

Hey Now !! I make a liveing from stupid folks !!!
Like driveing 2 hours to press NumLock !!
or driveing 4 hours to plug in a printer ,
Or just today getting a call from somebody on how to set their time and date , ( they had gotten into set up and knocked EVERY thing back to fact defaults !!)
My answer to stupid folks , " sign Here !! "

Hmmm...Saturday morning I had to pour creamer in someone's coffee for them because they couldn't get it out of the container...She may have been stupid...but maybe she just needed some coffee....I'm not sure! She set the container down, confused, picked up and set it down...she just didn't know how to do it.
I grabbed the container from the counter and unscrewed the lid a little bit, and poured her creamer for her. The lid didn't need to be unscrewed...but out of politeness, I acted like that was what was wrong with it.

She probably just needed coffee...or she was too stupid to pour something out of a caraffe. I don't know. Saturday mornings can be rough for young people depending on their Friday nights...when they act really stupid.

I know...because I have been that stupid.

Also, absent-mindedness is not stupidity. Just because I was too spacy to notice those olive-roll looking things were actually teabuns doesn't make me stupid.

Every now and then someone will open the door for me and stand in the doorway looking at me waiting for me to wheel in or out, holding the door open.
It happens more than I like to think about.

Those goddamn motherfuckers.

This is the part that makes them stupid, Flint. I bet it's happened to you too--someone is so determined to be polite that they stretch the shit out of their arm trying to hold an inward-swinging door open while also trying to let the other person go first.

Yeah I'm pretty stupid.

I'm pretty sure I got conned today.
An overweight woman was walking on the street today and me and my roommate and his friend were going home from class. She stopped us and said she is a victim of domestic abuse and she's pregnant and not from around here (Champaign Urbana, Illinois, USA) and is raising 38 dollars to get her "home."
My roommate said "what do you want us to do" and she said "just spare a little money so I can go home."

We reach for our wallets and my roommate pulls out a dollar. She says "sir you can help me out more than that (with some attitude!)" and I KNEW my roommate really wanted to say "bitch please be grateful!" but I wanted to get her to shutup so I gave her a 10. Yeah (that 10 was from my mom in a Halloween card she sent me! :yeldead: ). She said "thank you sir" then turned to H, my roommate's friend, and asked if he could help. He was very reluctant, but gave her a 5 (because I showed up my roommate with a 10, fuck I feel bad for H cause it's my fault).

10 minutes later reflecting on this I can tell she was a con artist. It's probably bullshit she isn't from around here just walking on CAMPUS calling out domestic abuse and she's "pregant" when she's really just fat. Fuck but my dumbass fell for it.

Reminds me of a time I was leaving my girlfriend's dorm and a well dressed walking man approached me and said his family was in the car a ways back and he was looking for I 74 interstate and needs money to get home and mentioned his Baptist church. Well I could tell from that immediately that it was bullshit so I said "I don't have my wallet unfortunately, but God Bless and I hope you do ok." God Bless made him grin and fortunately leave without me being conned (but he did ask me about my bike as I was unlocking it to leave).

But this time I was dumb. And now my roommate is jokingly calling me an asshole for forcing H to get his money doped. But it's true, how funny it is that I'm the asshole here.

Don't worry about it. Ten dollars is a small price to pay to learn this life lesson. It's actually the perfect amount, because it's enough that you will pay attention, but not enough to hurt you. You won't be conned anywhere near as easily next time because of this experience. Consider it an investment in your future ability to detect scams.

Bill goes back in my wallet and I give her .50 at that point.

Fresh you probably were conned, but you weren't stupid.
I gave the last money out of my purse to someone a couple of weeks ago and I figured he needed it more than me as he was desperate enough to be asking strangers. He only got about 63p (just over a dollar) but it made me feel good for quite a while.

Just remind yourself how lucky you are that $10 doesn't mean that much to you that you have to try and scam strangers for it. And next time stick to what you said to the Baptist scammer. Or offer to buy some take-out food if you think they might be genuine.

I wish I could find an embeddable clip for this, but no. So here's a link.

http://www.cmt.com/loaded/index.jhtml?vid=175391

This is from the second season of the show "Making the Team: The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders." Among other show segments, it contains the interview portion of the auditions. Give it time to buffer, then skip ahead to 3:45 minutes remaining. If you really can't wait for the setup, the pure comedy gold starts at 2:55 minutes remaining.

Guilty confession: I love this show. There is no earthly reason why this show should entertain me, but God help me, I am addicted.

You will like this one Zip. Girl I worked with lost her data cause she only used c: and didn't back it up. We advised her to put it on the server drive which is backed up every night.

And then I said, "The IT people keep those backup tapes for 6 months."

Her reply? :rolleyes: "But that file has a year's worth of data in it!":headshake

Condoleeza Jones?
Must say, watched the whole thing and really liked the deaf girl's lyrical presentation and how it moved the dance instructor.

That made my day, thanks Clod.

Hoof, the rest of the episodes can all be found in the menu on the right, if you find yourself craving more hot cheerleader action. :) Spoiler: the deaf girl is one of the best, she makes the team easily and I believe is the first deaf team member they've ever had.

I was just in a meeting in South Tahoe and someone mentioned the South Tahoe Public Utility District, which is abbreviated STPUD, but the locals pronounce it Stupid (http://www.stpud.us/). When I was driving back to Sacramento (California), I saw a political sign beside the road saying "Joe Smith for STPUD Director."

What's stupid about that?
 

Early in my career, I had a fax to send to five people and it was the first time I ever used a fax machine. I made five copies of the document I needed to send and gave them to the secretary, along with the list of names and numbers.

You did.

But now you know.

Go forth and sin no more.

Since I deal with sad looking homeless people pretty much all the time, I'm pretty immune. Most of them are with it enough not to try hitting me up for anything other than cigarettes.

Chances are you're going to see this lady again and again ... probably not pregnant. Nice touch, though, that she's asking for an odd amount. Bad on her that she's harassing people into coming across with more than a buck. Beggars used to have standards.

you didn't get conned. you got spare changed. conned is when they play upon your greed....


I gave a guy $20 outside a liquor store not too long ago. I knew the bullshit about his car breaking down with his kids in it was a come on.....I knew that although he promised to mail it back to me at the dealership, I'd never see it again. fuck it. not stupid.....weak. the guy caught me at a moment of low will power. he had a good sales pitch. i paid him to shut up and let me get in my car. chalk it up, babe!

Well if it's confessions time:
In my mid-teens I bought a watch from a mail-order add. The add suggested (but on later close examination, didn't actually promise) a combination digital and analogue display.
What arrived was an incredibly cheap digital display .. behind a PRINTED analogue face with the hands PAINTED ON! And the whole thing fell apart within a month anyway.
I paid about $12 for a valuable lesson about marketing and mail order crap. A good price, I think.

I feel so INCREDIBLY stupid....
 

I've been caught weak by just about every story mentioned in this thread so far. Car broke down with kids (in my case it was grandkids, and I gave the man my jumper cables, 5 cigarettes, and the whole $1.62 in my wallet), a woman trying to get "home." Once I even "loaned" a woman $80 for a tow truck. Oh yea, I'm a sucker for a sob story; maybe because I've been the subject of a few (though never enough to ask strangers for money). I also pledge to most of the Police/Fire/EMT solicitors that call, although that is seeding, so a different situation.

I've also been out of it enough to have a similar experience as the one wth the creamer caraffe, and stretching across to hold the door. Oh yea, I have my moments. :blush:

As to the smartass who was nervy enough to ask for more than you gave... at that point I may very well have taken the dollar back and walked away. Asking is one thing - demanding is another. Bitch. :mad2:

maybe you were a beggar in a previous life?

anyone ever buy speakers out of a van? UT?

I got offered them several times but no.

When I was a young kid I got tooken by some dude in an Atlantic City casino who sold me his stupid jewelry saying it was diamond and 14k gold. He got about $150 out of me which was good money for a young kid at the time.

But I didn't learn, I went for a lease deal on this truck and the dude sold me tire insurance. Tire insurance, can you believe it?

when you pop those tires just before you return the vehicle and get brand new ones for free... instead of a bill to replace them right before your lease matures, you'll feel vindicated.

(This is true and I have run over gawd knows what in this vehicles history... without worry)

Twice, both at the grocery store I worked at in high school, Jewel Osco (yeah Midwest!).
For the low, low price of $2500.

Jeeeezus, fresh, screw the fat lady beggar, you really got scammed on those speakers.

Back Of A Van speakers would go for about $250 a pair on campus, at most. Stolen shit is supposed to be cheaper, that's the moral tradeoff for the buyer.

no, no, see at Jewel/Osco they really bring the high end stuff, he paid a fair price.

I live in phoenix where the top three professions are as follows:

1) stripper (seriously, more strip clubs than mcdonald's)
2) escort
3) beggar

Our beggars work in shifts at all the interstate on/off ramps. I refuse to give them anything unless their cardboard sign is either really funny or really honest (I won't lie, I just need a beer is always a winner). It is seriously a profession for a lot of these people. Down town is another story though. These people are the real deal. I give them give certificates to the grocery store or fast food. i don't care if they buy beer with it, i just don't want them buying crystal with my help.

No, it is seriously funny.
I do try not to laugh.

The ones that do piss me off and I do want to call motherfuckers are the ones that see my cane and (which I would never do) ask if I can walk.
I tell them "very short distances, to the bathroom, stuff like that" (I don't tell them how much it hurts and that I cannot always do so). Then, inevitably, motherfucker will say "I would just walk all the time, I think you should".
I think they should shoot themselves.

~snipI live in phoenix where the top three professions are as follows:

1) stripper (seriously, more strip clubs than mcdonald's)
2) escort
3) beggar ~snip

Great...now UT is going to ask me to move too...

Do people really say that shit? I can't imagine.

I work in IT, my stories would exceed UT's bandwith limits.

That and worse.
Often it is "can you really not walk?"
You would be amazed at how many morons tell me to "just as jesus to heal me and I'll be alright tomorrow."
With a straight face.
It happens constantly. Less often people will ask if they can pray for me... I used to fall for it and then they would put their hands on me and try to heal me right there in public. Yes, more than once.
Now I just say "no thank you" or "on your own time".

More often than not, this is without ever introducing themselves or asking if they are interrupting in any way... they just walk up and start talking.

Almost daily when I am in public I have this entire conversation.
Someone walks up:
"What is wrong with you?"
I give them a brief description.
"Oh".
Then they walk away.
Sometimes while I am eating or in the middle of a conversation.
If I am in a bad mood I have said "you are interrupting me/are rude", but the above is usually how it goes.

I taught software.
Yeah.

I worked at a craft store years ago, and this woman stood in front of 12 feet of craft paint looking intently at it as I was stocking shelves. After about 3 or 4 minutes she says"soooo, this is paint?" I took a break asap

Well....was it paint?!?
:)

lol!

uhhh i dunno!

Ig Nobel Prize winners c/o Darwin Awards.

This mention goes to:
http://www.sunshine-project.org/inca.../wpafbchem.pdf

NO NO NO i didn't buy them
What i meant to say was I didn't buy them, but was offered twice. Sheesh!

I put in an alarm in a ware house that was storing speakers sold out of a van once ,
They paid cash and didn't make verry much eye contact .

We were approached for the bazillionth time by a another scammer tonight. It was the usual, "Excuse me, excuse me, I'm trying to get (somewhere)..." MB cut him off and said, "No, I don't have any money," and we turned around and kept walking. I looked back a few paces later, but he'd disappeared. Thank god.

He's the third guy in row I've noticed who, despite looking like a sad-sack deadbeat, was wearing VERY nice jacket. The last time this happened (last Tuesday), I couldn't help but compliment the man on his brand-new olive corduroy coat. He seemed to be appreciative.

bluecuracao:

I have had that experience in the city many times... I have trouble with "no money" and I use instead "I'm sorry. I can't help you today." I do make eye contact, and my smile is free and sincere.

The coat quality varies considerably, but is heavily weighted toward the dirty heavy large end of the scale.

although I try not to judge, I'm human, and the first thing I think when I see motorcyclists without helmets is --- STUPID!

Cloud is right there.....I just saw a chick this summer (riding on the back) with (barely) a shirt that was held on by a string, no helmet, no gloves, but what? Sunglasses......

I told my husband: If she would like to continue to be hot, she might want to put some gear on before her pretty skin is shaven off by the road when she hits it.

Watching that made me cringe a little on the inside...uuugh.

"Sorry for the incontinence." Written numerous times, in emails to the entire college, by a co-worker.

lol!!!

No...that's not stupid, that's just Hilarious!!!!
:rotflol:

"______ Pride"
Being proud of anything having to do with an association or coincidence of birth, not an actual achievement of your own.
Stupid.

For me, it's "Sorry, no," with eye contact, but not even slowing down. I didn't used to be that brusque, but 16 years of walking past these guys every day will get you to streamline a bit. They will still be there tomorrow if you give them cash or not. No homeless people starve in DC. Plenty of soup kitchens. Lots of shelters too. I donate $ to the shelters and kitchens to keep from feeling too much guilt.

ok....
Stupid people ask for money I see (in nice coats or not).....there's a reccurring theme here.....

I was not aware of that. The next time someone asks me for money I will call them stupid.

er, I think Zengum was berating himself for falling for a con, not that the requesting party was stupid.

....there's a recurring theme here......

Zengum did what when?!? what?

Sheesh, Cicero, you're stupid.

I'M KIDDING. You know I loves ya! :p :bolt:

RK...Their high school is pretty stupid too.
The only school I ever got in trouble in.......I'm glad I had a short stay there.

People who think they shouldn't be punished for breaking stupid rules are stupid.

Best run..sucka!! I may be stupid...but I bet I can still kick some major Shawnee...........#@*!!
:D

The only con I've been suckered into lately was accepting Cicero's challenge to reach 1,000 posts, when she was already 700 in front of me.

I thought the point about the stupid people and beggars was the sucker who gives an unreasonably large amount of money to a beggar because they believed some made-up sob story. I'm not really sure if that is stupidity though.
Or am I being stupid in not grasping your irony and you already knew this? Duhhhhhhh?

My next stupid people story comes from when I was working in a petrol station (gas station to USAns.) A refinery strike led to an odds-and-evens rationing system; you could only buy petrol on alternate days, depending on whether your number plate ended with an even or odd number.
Questions included:
*Is it the first digit or last digit I check? (from a guy whose numbers were ALL even!)
*Is zero an even number? (Just let me check my reference list for you sir...)
*What's an even number? (WTF? Helllloooooo?)