Feb 19, 2009: Fire Extinguisher
 

Fire extinguishers here in the US, and probably throughout most of the world come in three basic types, labeled A, B and C.

These types and their use is outlined below;

http://cellar.org/2009/fire.jpg


But the Russians, while they probably have the A, B and C types, have one more.

Not as fast, but more fun, is type Pee.

http://cellar.org/2009/russian.jpg

Caution: type Pee is for very slow fires only. ;)

Why does it burn when I pee, mommy?

Fire Extinguisher
 

It actually says.......

1. After consuming this container......
2. Do NOT go swimming for 20 minutes......
3. When swimming....Do NOT pee in the pool.....:D

1. Take out the cork; sneeze; enjoy a bottle of western decadent Mountain Dew...
2. Each bottle of that crap contains enough calories to keep 20 men alive for a day...
3. If you bend over and fart next to a fire, it will flare up....

[translator]It's beer.[/translator]

Left out Class E fires.
Burning nuclear material => Chernobyl

Ingredient: Sand

I've had one of these fuckers all along and didn't know it.

Thanks, XOB.

In Colombia a few years ago we were in my open-top jeep driving out of town to a farm for a BBQ. We were stopped by traffic police who noticed we had no fire extinguisher. I showed them the two cases of beer we had in the back and assured them that we'd have enough pee to put out a considerable blaze. They laughed and let us go - one of the benefits of living in Latin America!

you have to carry a fire extinguisher in your vehicle in Colombia?

No; the moral of the story is: you have to carry a fire extinguisher OR two cases of beer.

Because you loved an unclean woman.

There are clean ones?

Beer IS a suitable fire extinguisher to carry in your vehicle or have in your kitchen!!!


IS IS IS!

What is in those class B extinguishers? Foam. It forms a blanket on top of burning oil and smothers it (where water would displace the oil and spread it around).

Take your beer, open the top just a tad (or narrow the opening with a finger), shake well, allow foam to spurt out onto the fire, create a foam mat. Wait for foaming to stop, drink slightly flat beer, belch, continue barbecue. Simple.

Mama's gonna check out all of your girlfriends for you...
Mama won't let anyone dirty get through...

This is the translation of that instruction:


1. In event of fire, quickly down your bottle of Vodka

2. Wait 20 minutes for alcohol to be absorbed in order to reach the required
National Blood Alcohol Standard of .2 -.5

3. Proceed to use extinguisher. If unable to do so due to intoxication,
urination is acceptable alternative. Aim stream in sweeping motion and
stagger away from fire