kids sneaking sweets.
 

My first and third children have been found out: they are pilfering sweets and snacks out of the cupboard to their rooms and indulging themselves at night. My wife and I object to this because of the potential to attract ants and other vermin, and because we object to the secretiveness of the acts which we fear will prove to form a habit of deceit.
We've tried to permit late night snacking in the kitchen; No help. WE've tried threats and intimidation; no help.
Our latest attempt is to remove the temptations. No more sweets in the house.
I'm open to suggestions. You got any?

There's your answer.

If you buy sweets again, buy just enough for one snack, and eat them the same day as the grocery shopping. Then you don't have to police.

Another thought: Just get ice cream. They can't hide that in their rooms.

My son (14) would eat every bite of chocolate in the house within minutes of getting home from the grocery with it. Now I have Secret Chocolate--I buy it and HIDE it! Works great! Then if he or I have the undeniable chocolate jones, I rustle some up from my hiding place-voila! My son only asks, "Do you have any Secret Chocolate?" about once a week.

Our latest attempt is to remove the temptations. No more sweets in the house.

Outa site outa mind !!

How old are they?

sneaky kids.
 

The two who are taking the sweets are nine and four years old.
on a side note, the personalities involved are interesting. the eight year old is not involved in the sneakiness. and the two year old isn't able to participate yet.
Secret chocolate is a tempting idea, but my wife and I wouldn't leave it alone. She occasionally makes cookies and such instead.

the nine year old, i think you could stand to start giving a meager allowance (like, a dollar a week or something), and tell to buy their own candy or else they wont get any.

The four year old, I don't know.

My older brother was hyper-active, and our family doctor recomended he stop eating sugar (this was before the age of zombie medication). So, we all stopped eating crap sugar foods. We didn't have it in the house.

Snack food isn't good, for anybody. You would be better off just eating healthier. I'm not trying to preach at you, I'm just saying it can be done.

We have changed to healthier snack choices as well.. but about once a week( lately once a paydate.. so once every 2 weeks, I suppose) we have a family dinner night.. this is something sinful, and messy, and most likely not great for you. Such as natchoes with pounds of cheese, deep fried goodies, tacos etc.. fun foods that are usually finger foods. We pick a movie, make dinner as a family ( even the 2 year old can get things out of the fridge, or help put napkins on the table) Then we treat ourselves to dessert. Chocolate bars, cookies, a pie.. whatever. This takes all night.. even when we "just make pizza" But its a blast! And now we all look forward to our treat night.

The rest of the week its, yogurt, crackers and cheese, fruit, low salt pretzles etc...

I'm not a parent, but this is my thought. Make sure that you aren't doing anything to make your children feel ashamed about eating. Sometimes, when kids feel ashamed about eating or their body image, they will resort to hiding food and eating it in private where they don't feel scrutinized. Body image issues can start as early as 7 - or so I've heard - so your oldest one may be dealing with feelings of this. The 4 year old - maybe mimicing the older siblings behavior.

I guess what I'm trying to say is - make sure your kids know that it's okay to eat - and they are growing and it's perfectly okay for them to eat and they can eat out in the open. Maybe do something fun in the kitchen or family room and make a snacking area - like some fun bowls and plates, placemats, etc - make it a party whenever you and your family share in a special treat. Your kids will associate snacktime with family and fun and hopefully they will keep the food out of their rooms.

When I was studying for the bar exam a few weeks ago, I did eat in my room, but because I couldn't get any peace and quiet anywhere else whilst studying and eating.

My parents were very teeth-conscious, having had bad trouble with their own teeth. Our sugar intake was very carefully monitored - sweets, fizzy drinks, chocolate and ice cream were rarely in the house. Even squash (concentrated fruit drink diluted with water) and biscuits were kept out of our reach and dispensed by Mum.

Also, growing up in the '70s to working class parents meant that money was limited so meals were filling and nutritious and the concept of snacking virtually non-existent. It was a real culture shock to go to a friend's house and watch her help herself to Cheddars (cheese biscuits) or a packet of crisps from the cupboard. If we were hungry we waited for dinner. If we had had dinner it was tough, we should have eaten more at the table.

So we didn't hide sweets/ snacks and eat them in our rooms. But if we were given an errand to run we sneaked off to the sweetshop and blew our pocket money on rubbish, and gorged ourselves all the way home. We took the long way back to avoid going past Mum's friend's house, in case she saw us. We'd go into our next neighbour's garden to put the evidence in the bin before arriving home all innocent.

I think sneakiness is part of being a child. Like riding on the crossbar of your friend's bike - you know it's wrong, you know why it's wrong, you wouldn't want your Mum to know - but oooooh, it's just so good!

I honestly wouldn't worry about the deceit.

We have a problem with this too. I have a 5 and 6 yo girl and boy.

I intentionally leave candy and sweets out on the counter and keep an eye on how fast they disappear. I also note how much they eat at dinner. From these two things, I get an idea of how "out of hand" their candy eating is.

What I have settled on is to frequently discuss nutrition with them to give them a reason not to eat too much. I can't police them at school and I don't want to make them neurotic about eating - I'm concerned especially about my daughter to make sure her self-image is independent of her eating habits.

Our conversation might go like this:

I see them going for the candy (Me in blue, them in grn)
Are you hungry?
Yes.
What does it mean when you are hungry?
puzzled looks
I think it means that your body is telling your tummy that it needs food to keep growing and your tummy, in turn, is telling you to give it some fuel. So what do you think your body wants you to give it? Its not like your tummy has hands and legs and can go to the fridge and pick what it really needs. You are in charge of that so what do you think you should do???
Give it some food?
I'd say that's probably what your tummy really wants.
I love candy, though.
You do!?!?
You bet!! And just as soon as I've given my tummy what it needs then I can have some.
Hey kids - what is Daddy supposed to do when my car is running out of gas?
Stop at 7-11 and put some gas in it?
Can I tell you kids something if you promise not to tell anyone? There was this one time that I was out of gas but instead of gas, I filled my car with Skittles! My car was sooooo happy!! Guess what happened next?!?!
It broke down?
Exactly! Why?
It wanted gas but you gave it Skittles???
Because my car doesn't run on Skittles! And little boys and girls don't run on Skittles either! But they are yummy tho.

I gave up on hiding candy. They need to learn at home from me and their mother how to manage the decision of when and how much candy and food to eat. Its not easy but we agreed a while back that not keeping candy in the house was just depriving them of the opportunity to learn how to think it through and make the right decision under our guidance. Same with soft drinks and cereal. My kids can pretty much go down the cereal aisle with me and figure out which cereals are food and which are candy disguised to look like food. And I tell them that its hard for me too - I'd rather have Lucky Charms than Raisin Bran or Cheerios but that my body expects me to give it food and it won't be healthy and strong if I don't. I think it really helps them to know that its hard for us too.

But we don't demonize candy and junk food. We just let the kids know that while candy and McDonald's are tasty, they are an occasional treat and we shouldn't pretend that our body can run on that stuff.

That works for 5 and 6 year olds. I have no idea what to tell you about the 9 year old.

I have an 18 yr old, 10 yr old and a 14 mo old at home. I've also raised a now 23 yr old as well as another teen who lived with us for a couple of years when they were in their mid-teens. I used to have problems with one or two of the kids scarfing ALL of the sweets and leaving none for anyone else. This effectively screwed those that ate responsibly.

I developed a system whereby each person is allowed to order (via me, the grocery shopper) a snack item for the week. It could be anything from cookies, popcorn, gummy bears, ice cream, nuts, or a chunk of cheese to pudding or yogurt. But this snack was all they would get for the week. They had the choice of eating it all in one sitting or spreading it out for 7 days. If they took a snack belonging to someone else, they forfeited their snack for the following week in favor of the shorted person (who got two). They also have the same plan for drinks. Each person gets assigned drinks (usually soda/tea) and they have to use them sparingly or they will be drinking nothing but water by week's end.

I also stock the less expensive and healthier snacks for the family such as pretzels and apples/oranges. If they run out of their sweets, they can always eat the household snacks. Juice and Milk are provided in unlimited quantities.

I found that this system gives each person control over how much they want to eat at a time and still teaches them to save and conserve. They also learn to respect each other's property.

I am on a tight budget so meal planning is a big issue. I always serve home cooked, well balanced meals for dinner and everyone is expected to participate (or go hungry).

It has worked well for me so far :). They're all healthy and none appear to have any food issues (overeating/undereating/addictions/excessive tooth decay).

Stormie

I've never had a sweets problem myself, probably cause I like savory things more. If my mom buys a bag of candy I'd steal a few and eat 'em... if she buys a box of Cheez-its i'll steal the box and eat them all.

If I had to pick a single parenting philosophy, this would be it. If kids believe that making the right choice (any right choice) is "easy" for the adults they see, they feel like failures when it turns out to be hard for them, and just give up. If you help them understand that everyone has a hard time making the right choice sometimes, they'll grow to respect the fact that you made the right choice anyway.