No

do cashews give you gas?

no.

Do I have gas right now?

yes

Does your gas cost as much as Speedway gas?

Uh...maybe?

Do I know what Speedway gas is? (no)

Yes.

Does that leave you with a paradox?

No, it leaves me with a pair of jacks and an ace kicker.

Do you play poker?

No, the game does interest me though.

Can you teach me?

Yes, possibly.

Are you playing with a full deck?

No. But a .50 Desert Eagle beats an Ace High Royal Flush In Spades.

Do you use public toilets?

If I really have to, so yes.

Do you pay for public toilets?

No

Have you ever paid per sheet of toilet paper?

No; but, it would add a novel connotation to the expression "pay as you go."

Does anyone "TP" anyone else's house anymore?

Yup. Still happens 'round this way on Hell Night.

Are you worried about Jesus coming and using your washrag to clean up with?

No

Do you think He'll ask the Buddha to wash his back?

Yes

Do you think the Buddha will?