Stacey, yes, that sucks!
But as Brianna told you, if you can not change the situation, you better :) to change your mind. I started "wearing" my smile and positive work attitude as a dress:) It really helped.

I'll have to get that book the next time I go on a self-help shopping spree on Amazon :)
When someone hurts my feelings or makes me angry, my tactic is to completely avoid them. I won't look at them and I'll only speak to them if absolutely necassary, very cool and without making eye contact. I went a whole year without talking to my stepfather when I was 16- and we lived together! I went 1 1/2 years without talking to the cook who made me cry, except to say "I need fries on that club, please" and the latest mangirl who upset me, I'm not looking at her either. I just want them to fade away. Yeah, this is probably an unhealthy way to deal with them, but I can't bring myself to like people who hurt/ distress me, and it won't make my life easier if I tell them to f&%$ off every time I see them, either.
Besides, I didn't mention this in my first post, but the mangirl who upset me that day, well I told another girl about it and she could tell I was upset. She must have went to mangirl and told her she should apologize. I heard mangirl say, very loudly "I'm not gonna apologize for something if I'm not sorry!" And yes, I am sure that they were talking about the same situation, because I asked the nice girl, and she admitted that mangirl wasn't sorry and refused to apologize.
ANYWAY, yes, I am feeling better, I guess. I don't know. I have an appointment with a psychtherapist on Feb 7. I would like to see what I can do about my lack of motivation and boredom with life in general. ..But I have no problems that I can think of right now, except for this damn Visa/MC merchant processing sales job that I got myself into, that I don't want to do because it's boring and I hate sales, but I have all these friggin business cards, and I feel obligated, and my husband thinks it's such a good idea...UGH! Other than that, everything's peachy:)

Have you tried beating the ever-loving shit out of them? Sometimes that works. http://www.cellar.org/images/smilies/cool.gif

that only works for guys Beestie. guys can beat the hell out of someone, then drink a beer with them and tell a few raunchy jokes. women will hate someone, smile directly into their face after a verbal conflict, then harbor a grudge for 3 years after their own death.

Over any slight, real or *imagined*. :eyebrow:

Baahahaha! Good one. Shiiiiit, I wish. If he actually WAS smoking before work, why the hell isn't he sharing? God knows I could use some as a stress reliever.

Stacy: you hit the nail on the head when you said, "Doesn't it suck to have to act fake all day?! I think it must be unhealthy to suppress your emotions and act opposite of how you're feeling. I read an article about that- it supposedly increases anger. Maybe THAT'S why I have road rage!"

Try dealing with a chronic illness day in and day out. It will exhaust you and talk about anger...sheesh! And yes, it IS unhealthy to supress your emotions. Talk about a walking time bomb. Plus, you'll just get sick from the inside out...also not a good thing. Then, you'll just be more pissed for being sick, and the cycle starts all over...

Maybe if you can find the time to seek out a local support group. Talking about your problems with others who are going through a similar situation might help. Just make sure that they are not "fair weather Supporters". Those are people who will tell you to your face, "Yes, we will support you" and then in the next breath say, "Oh, suck it up and deal. How can we support you with such a negative attitude?" (trust me, I've been through this, and it sucks).

Support, IMO, should be unconditional. Not this, "I'll only support you if you do this" bullshit. At any rate, all the best to you! ;)

You've got that right. In Crohn's circles it's common to hear, "I'm sick and tired ... of being sick and tired."

Amen brother!

Oh for the love of god--you've all ripped that off from the alcoholics. They're sick 'n tired of being sick 'n tired, too.

Couldn't say where it originally came from. How do you know the alkies didn't get it from us? Plus I'd have to say we deserve it more. We don't do it to ourselves.

The other Crohn's poster I really liked was a picture of a digestive system with the logo: "I hate my guts."

Neither do they.

Yes they do.

I hope everything’s going well with your psychiatrist. I think I can help you (and save you $80 an hour :) ).

First, what is a 'problem'? Let’s try and define it.

When I do not like what is happening.
When I do not like what has happened.
When I do not like what is going to happen.

For example:

Things that have happened
- You have burst into tears at work
- You’ve had bad relationships with strangers/friends/lovers
- You have reacted emotionally to ‘little things’ that ‘shouldn’t bother you’ (who says?)
- You find yourself ‘complaining, bitching, whining and moaning about things that upset me’ (we all do that!)
- You have related well to people with Aspurges (who generally have more common sense than most)
- You have been diagnosed as ‘depressed’ by a standardised test

Things you think might happen
- You'll be diagnosed as mentally ill
- People won’t like or want you in their lives
- Life will get better if you change jobs
- You can’t change jobs because no one else will want you
- Life will get better if you exercise more
- People will think you’re whiney, weak or ‘hopeless’ for talking about your problems
- You’ll find your identity in a self-help book

Now I’m going to relieve you of these terrible burdens. The things that have happened are behind you. They do not exist any more. Gone. Say goodbye. Go on, it’s really true. You should already feel brilliant!

The things you think might happen are just thoughts. No one knows the future - it only exists in your thoughts. Reality NEVER matches up. You know when you’re afraid of something but it’s not that bad once it happens? Or when you can’t be bothered to go to the gym but enjoy yourself when you get there? All the same thing. You do not know the future.

So there's no point worrying about any of that.

Back to the present. The other source of problems is what is happening now. For example, you are in a traffic jam, and if it doesn’t start bloody moving in the next five minutes I’m going to be late for work getamoveonyoublindoldbat I have somewhere to be!

To me, this is madness. This is what everyone does. If you are mad Stacey, you’re not alone.

Why is this mad? Because you are resisting what is already happening.

Do you see the irony? It’s already happening! This is now!

So, if you can succeed in living life without reacting to what is going on around you, just observing with a slight smile on your face as you watch everyone else get exasperated with the present moment, then your problems will disappear. This is a guarantee. A quick fix and a long-term solution. Don’t waste your money on self-help books or expensive psychiatrists. Enjoy the moment!

;)

:thumbsup: I couldn't have put it better myself, catwoman. BUT .... it's not always so easy to do (ALWAYS worthwhile if you can manage it).