The things I described are beliefs followed by ignorant people such as those I described.

I'll be the first to admit when I'm wrong, but that hasn't happened in our discussion yet. And there's a better word to describe people like me; it's "correct".

Don't worry though. I fully expect you to mistakenly make false accusations of a grammatical error where there isn't any while completely avoiding the topic at hand. There are more than a few adjectives that spring to mind for you such as "anal", "wrong", "pathetic", etc. But why waste our time going back and forth. You'll never admit you're wrong even though you clearly are. So what's the point?

Radar, I don't happen to agree with you here ... but you might consider how your statement quoted above applies to yourself.

The definition of "ignorant" is not "doesn't agree with Radar's worldview."

Wow that's a hell of statement.


I love this line, the "wrong" just sets it apart from everything else. First time I've ever heard someone just called plain "wrong" usually they stated something "wrong", or making the "wrong" assumption. So if Dave was to agree with Radar would that make Radar "wrong".

which would cause a paradox unraveling the fabric of time/space. c'mon, dave, do it!

~james

Oh..I was talking about *dave's* ignore list. Isn't that the fate of people who pursue those who "refuse to admit they misused a word"? :-)

I'm not worried about Radar's ignore list...how much should I think about a bartender who's known among the rave crowd as MrE_Man and once held an email address of jablowmi@hotmail.com ?

This is causing my head to hurt in precisely the same way as Daffy Duck's "If this week was next week last week" speech.

Nurse, I need some aspirin.

Oh, and could you loosen this strap here a bit. I'm okay with my arms being crossed, but it's just a hair too tight. Thanks. What's that? No, the walls are plenty soft.

Actually if Dave agreed with me, he would admit he was wrong and he would thus be right. But since he won't admit it he continues to be wrong.

I don't know how much you should think about me, but it's obvious you think about me enough to search around for information about me. It's flattering to know I'm so important to you. And since you seem to care so much I'll share more information with you.

Yes, I bartend on the weekends and I'm a computer network engineer during the week. This is helping me save for my upcoming marriage. After I graduated with a degree in computer science engineering from the University of Nevada - Reno, I was pretty broke and started dealing craps in Las Vegas casinos. The money was pretty good so I did that for a number of years. Then I decided to go back into the computer field so I got my Novell and Microsoft networking certifications in 1995 and renewed Novell once and have kept renewing the Microsoft certs. I'm also a certified trainer so I can help others learn to be skilled networking professionals. I'm not married to any operating system and I know what's best for any given situation. I'm paid pretty well for consulting, though not as well as I was 2 years ago when people were begging me to work for them which is why I'm doing some bartending. There's certainly nothing wrong with being a bartender, nothing wrong with dealing casino games, and nothing wrong with being a computer networking consultant. I attended raves for a number of years because I like electronic music. I have won awards for doing youth outreach information booths at raves and registering young people to vote. My old email address jablowmi@hotmail.com was what I used to register on websites so my junkmail wouldn't come to my regular email address. It was a joke between me and a friend. We chose porn star names. His is Hugh G. Rection, and mine was Heywood Jablowmi. My beautiful fiance and I will soon be married and we will probably have a few kids.

Is there anything else you'd like to know?

I wouldn't make fun of what I do for a living if I were you. I might go to your job and slap the dick out of your mouth.

Seriously though, I wouldn't hazard to guess what you do for a living, mostly because I'm genuinely not interested in you in the slightest.

Yes. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

I'm guessing both. But I've never seen a turtle without a shell. I imagine they'd look pretty freaky. ;)

My man, You thoroughly crack me up. :thumb:

James, I *might* be willing to give an extra discount to you, since Casey posts here too. You try and stiff me on the paypal account though and we'll be fightin'. :)

Currently in the VIP room, we have lots of cold beer, the finest wines, and a boatload of cheesesteaks from Jimmy's.

I was going to have guns in there, but I don't think mixing guns and alcohol is the best of ideas. :)

So much for "noninitiation of violence".

As long as we're exchanging advice, I would recommend if you are planning to assault me that you wear *good* quality body armor; I might have the +Ps in my side arm that day. Folks wear heavy clothing around here in the wintertime.

As for the dick-in-mouth-at-work idea, you may have confused me with Starchild, another LPer from CA, discussed in another thread here. He was proud of being a "sex worker" (rather than thinking it was suitable for use as a random insult) and didn't advocate that his vegetarian beliefs should be imposed on others...yet.

But he was all for it once "his people" were solidly in power.
It's really disappointing how quickly LP principles seem to desert some party members...some of them only have to think you're making fun of them.

Don't worry, you'll know when I'm *really* making fun of you; it will be something like <i>Overheard at the rave: "See that guy behind the bar? He's Mr E-Man. He does our 'youth outreach'. He'll take care of you."</i> :-)

How's about you allow guns, but restrict ammo?

Youth outreach at raves....hmmm...*sycamore thinks of the twisted possibilities*

--
"Hey dude! Just sign this membership form and I'll give ya two tabs!"

"Duuuuude! Sweet!"
--
"If we get the Libertarians in office, you can do as much X as you want b/c it will be available at Starbucks!"

"Oh man! I am soooo voting for you guys!"
--
"You feelin' good right now?"

"Oh my God! I'm floating!"

"I've got an even better high! Vote Libertarian!"

"Ohhh....wow! I need to be touched!"

I don't know if this is how it's done or not...but Tob, maybe we should do something like this for the Aloysius Party. We could gather everyone around that little outdoor stage next to Academic Hall and pass out a bunch of weed, listen to Pink Floyd, and sign up members.

Look, we get slang in there, and he gets a few pints in him, and there's no telling what could happen! He'll have rounds hidden on him...you just know it!

Oh, wait a minute...slang can't come anyway...he's not on the VIP list...yet.

Griff...are you smelling a new one sentence story here? I am. :)

Oh come on....alcohol, tobacco *and* firearms, It's a trifecta. Fire, firesticks and firewater. Of course the *other* trifecta is "sex, drugs and rock-n-roll".
Is *that* what that is? I was wondering....:-)

It's like being in a room full of manure, but then you smell something sweet, like Krispy Kremes. :)

I'm not sure, but I think Maggie meant "youth outreach" in a Catholic Church kind of way, rather than a "get them into the LP when they're young and they'll vote LP as adults" kind of way.

That's how I read it, anyway.

If necessary, I'll hook him up through my paypal account. I'm already signed up.

Heck, I'm ready to pay his bail resulting from any problems arising at the living poetry experiment, so I'll happily cover him in the VIP room.

Oooh OOH OOH!! (Mr. Kotter, Mr Kott-tair!!) Can I be ammo monitor? I won't drink (*much*) and I'm already trained to do searches. It's part of my job.

Possibly. When I was reading that bit in Radar's post about youth outreach and raves, I just put 2 and 2 together and got 83. :)

Sycamore,
Golly Gee Whiz....Why pretend like you know me,
when clearly...ya don't! If you want to whine and stomp on sour grapes, take your ball and don't play anymore...but spare me the dramatics, mmmK?

Here's where you have strayed from the Bible and the word of God...the Bible is NOT up for interpretation, that's something lawyers do to get the guilty off the hook. The Bible is translated. If one interprets the Bible, it is now man's word, not God's. In my opinion, people who interpret the Bible or interpret the laws have problems translating the true meaning of it, whether that is intentional is a case by case answer.
The Bible is a book of History,Faith, and Instruction all together, you can not separate one from the others. It's all or nothing...
History: Nations who turned against God were wiped out. Noah built an ark and survived the flood. Jesus lived and preached and was crucified. God spoke to Moses. Sodom and Gomorrah rained brimstone and fire, etc...etc.
Faith: Belief and trust in.(If you don't believe in the Historical happenings, you don't have faith.)
Instruction: Follow His Statutes, and do them.

Here's the link, thanks for the heads-up.

http://www.lcweb.loc.gov/exhibits/scrolls/toc.html

And the ark.

http://www.wyattmuseum.com/noahs-ark-05.htm

And Sodom and Gomorrah.

http://www.wyattmuseum.com/cities-of-the-plains-02.htm

Here is the link to the attempt to rewrite the history of the Alamo. I live in San Antonio, and am highly offended and appalled, this doesn't include the words of the Houston councilman, but he was all over my T.V. every night for a week talking proudly of deception and lies!

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,53968,00.html

Radar congrats on the marriage :)

Well, that wasn't quite what I was thinking, actually. If you identify somebody dispensing intoxicants at a rave as "Mr E Man", I bet most people don't think of the comic book characters--whether they're "utes" or not.

But if *you* want to think it...go ahead. :-) I remeber the guy who was the "VP of membership and outreach" for the local swingers...I mean, excuse me, "polyamory support group". He did indeed take the word "outreach" pretty literally....although there we were talking about consenting adults.

As for Cairo's assertion that the Bible can be translated--much less *read*--without interpreting it, well, that's a quaint idea. I suppose it's of vital interest to those who want to put forward their own understanding of the Bible as carrying the Authority of The Word Of God to deny that any "interpretation" at the hands of a human has taken place. But that doesn't make the notion any more plausible; any use of language results in interpretation by the listener or reader.

Interestingly enough, one of my-Daddy-the-clergyman's most prized posessions was a highly respected and authoritiative multi-voume Biblical encyclopedic reference, commentary and concordance called "The Interpreter's Bible".

But Radar you specifically described dave as "wrong” you didn't say his statement was "wrong" you just said he was "wrong". Second, you just described yourself as correct, therefore negating any chance of anyone listing to any statement you make. Just trying to point out you lack of diplomacy. :)
Oh yeah you also resorted to name-calling. Come on Radar lets just all get along, we could be one big huge dysfunctional family.

Oh,. my. What an interesting thought. :-)

<h3>Cairo</h3>
nice post, links help a lot. The extra time spent in finding and inserting them into the post is worth having people know WTF yer talking about (even if they dont agree). :)

That sounds like a tempting idea, but the vet discovered that our poor mascot, while in for his neutering, also had an umbilical hernia. So not only is his empty sack pathetically dangling around with no useful purpose, his belly is shaved and has a 2-inch incision with stitches.

It's really rather sad. I just can't think of politics with him in this state, so I'm disbanding the Party. I'd rather have it disbanded in its prime anyway, instead of dwindling away like the LP.

Really, God's language is English? Kinda like how all aliens speak English in the movies, huh?

Because I thought most of the Bible was originally written in Hebrew. Which means that Man had to translate it, and Man is prone to error. Are you saying that translation is an exact science, and does not involve interpretation? Even today, translators do not agree on some of the passages.

God's language cannot be written with ink and paper for humans to fully comprehend. Haven't you seen Dogma? Our head would explode if we heard the true word of God.

So it follows that the Bible is also the work of Man. It was inspired by God, and the teachings of Jesus, but it was still written down by Man, in Man's language. Whenever you go from God's language to that of Man, you're gonna lose something in the translation.

Don't forget ... another part of my job is tying people down. I get paid to do it AND it's legal.

I look in wonderment at exactly how far off topic this thread has wandered.

Pretty amazing really.

Oh wait.

Perhaps not.

When exposed to matter as dense as a black hole, time, space, and light bend ... so I guess it's the same with topics too, eh?

Sycamore: It's more like this. We setup a booth with information pamphlets, stickers, signs, etc. and we enjoy the music. Someone comes by to ask what we're doing and we tell them we're trying to end the drug war and keep the government out of places they don't belong, like our wallets, bedrooms, and gun cabinets.

We sometimes have discussions regarding various Libertarian positions, we ask if they're registered to vote and if they aren't we offer to register them.

I wouldn't be initiating violence toward you or anyone else. It might be my own dick I slap. Who knows?

Gosh you're scary.

That wouldn't be much of an insult. While I don't use any drugs or sell any I don't see anything wrong with people who do. That's their personal choice and it's no more wrong than people who choose to be vegetarians. Nobody can tell anyone else what they may or may not consume, not even the government.

And the name isn't “Mr E-Man”. It's MrE Man as in Mystery Man you fucking twit.

Free people don't ask permission to own gun or ammo. People aren't GIVEN rights by the constitution. We're born with rights and the constitution merely defends those rights. The 2nd Amendment defends our right to own an unlimited number of guns of any type including fully automatic machine guns, with an unlimited amount of any type of ammunition including Teflon coated armor piercing hallow tipped rounds, without any permission from or notification to the government.

You read it correctly wolf. It's my way of introducing them to Libertarian ideas before they're corrupted or entirely turned off of politics by the two major parties.

*** NEWSFLASH FOR CAIRO ***

The bible IS THE WORD OF MEN AND NOT THE WORD OF GOD!!! It was written BY MEN hundreds of years after the fact. It's not historically factual, not an authority of any kind, and not any more important than any other religious text.


Thanks Cam. That's nice of you. I have a good friend named Cam. He's Vietnamese. So is my fiancé. I already speak some Spanish, and Japanese, and I'm currently working on Vietnamese, but it's much more difficult.

He was wrong in his false accusation. Not only was his statement wrong, but his actions were wrong. He himself was wrong.

Cam, don't get caught up in semantics so much that you miss the message. What I said regarding trivial things such as dietary restrictions in the grand scheme of things is truthful, honest, and insightful. Christianity is no more valid than Islam or any other religion because in the end it's all about the golden rule. I can recite bible verses with the best of them and show you how Jesus of Nazareth taught that church and state should remain separate. Or he Jesus of Nazareth taught that people shouldn't pray in public (in a public school or an official government meeting for instance), but would it change your mind?

I posted my personal beliefs. You have posted yours and I respect your right to do that. But when you claim that a religious text with more holes than Swiss cheese as historical fact I've got to call bullshit. I hope you'll understand. If you merely say it's your opinion that every word in the bible is true I lump you together with all the other Christian fundamentalists. But saying the Bible is historical fact is like claiming Peter Pan is non-fiction.

The LP may have few less members, but we’ve got more members in elected office than ever before. It sounds like the members we still have are doing a better job at getting elected. Those that left were the equivalent of friends that don't attend your wedding because it's raining outside. Not much of a friend at all. Those that stayed (nearly all of them) were the friends that help you move.

The attrition rate for the LP is far lower than that of the major two parties. In fact normally the party is growing. It's just the last couple of years with highly questionable elections that have thrown things off a bit.

Hi MaggieL,
I'm glad you brought up the "to deny that any "interpretation" at the hands of a human has taken place."...I never denied it because it has taken place, and that is the precise reason why I do not follow the new books.
The Dead Sea Scrolls prove beyond doubt that the Torah of today is word for word the Torah of Third Century B.C.E. because all these years it was translated at the hands of man...men who understood and feared the Wrath they would bring upon themselves if they "interpreted" what God meant. A sense of conscience, if you will, that is sorely lacking today.

Sure, the reader or listener applies the words of God to their own lives, to put forward their own understanding...to themselves. But the Bible itself is purely God's words and will, and is not subject to interpretation. The ones who do this, end up with a book of man's words and will....
And having to follow man's laws of this land alone, is enough for me! ;)

well, why didnt you say so in the first place? where do i sign?

~james

I completely agree with you that all religions are based around the golden rule. And I agree with you that all religions are equal. I'm catholic, but I find other religions interesting, especially Islam, which is so much like Christianity, it's scary once you get past anything to do with jihad.

When you say you can find passages that say something you want you do not comprehend the vastness of the bible. Anyone who wants to prove anything can probably something to back it up in the bible.

You say you can find passages where Jesus said do not pray in public, I'll agree in fact I'll even provide a link for you since you once again failed to provide any proof. Matthew 6 . Now see if you can prove your statement about church and state. I believe you but I want to see if you can do your own research.
I don't see how reciting these versus are going to change my mind about anything. We were not arguing these things.
Then you threw in this thing about me saying the bible is historical fact. Which if you read my statement from earlier in the thread you would see I specifically said it wasn't. It's a book of faith; it's based on historical events. Read the gospels, they don't agree on everything, but their general message is usually the same.


I'm not caught up in the semantics, I'm pretty sure I got your message. You called everyone who disagrees with you wrong. You called us a bunch of idiots. And you made it perfectly clear you are "correct". I was just trying to helpfully point out that this probably isn't the best way to go about things. Being able to admit your wrong, listening to arguments, and not throwing other random bullshit out every time someone pokes a hole in your argument is something you definitely need to work on. I've just reread this board from when you joined and I noticed a few things. You provided very few facts, and just repeated what you said before and then threw something else out as a distraction technique. Nobody wants to listen to that.

uh, radar, YOU might want to reread MY post, which actually was more on the order of speaking about libertine ideas rather than libertarian ones.

Well, you may be happy that I brought it up, but unfortunately you don't seem to understand what I said. Assuming for the moment that the original texts are in fact "God's word", they can not be understood by Man without interpretation; the very process of understanding language requires interpretation. To simply proclaim it "not subject to interpretation" betrays an ignorance of how language works.

My own belief is that the best understandings of the Transcendant and Her "works" use language only as a feeble adjunct, and maintain an awareness of and humilty about the functioning and limitations of language. I find religions based soley on veneration of ancient texts largely fall short of effectively conveying truth.

Wtttgenstein once said "Whereof one cannnot speak, thereof one must remain silent."

I do comprehend the "vastness". I don't think you comprehend the lack of accuracy, the holes in the bible, or the hypocrisy of those who claim to be Christians yet want to prayer in public schools, 10 commandments posted at courthouses, etc.

I have never failed to provide "proof". I gave my personal opinion about those who placed something as trivial as dietary restrictions on a par with not killing other people. The mere fact that I gave that opinion is all the proof you need. And I said I COULD provide you with bible verses but that there would be no point in doing so. Now step back and look at what I said again.

DUH!!!

That's exactly what I said in the first place. I do more than my own research. I do it for most other people and I provide sources whenever I make factual statements. If it's a statement of opinion, I am the source. I already said there was no point in me providing bible verses when they wouldn't change your mind. You're obviously a Christian fundamentalist. My personal opinion is that Americans are in far more danger from these people than from any "jihad" from even the most twisted group of Muslim extremists. I am the source for my opinion. So don't claim I'm not giving sources.

Everyone who disagrees with me having a personal opinion is wrong.

Wow, you're such a giver. How helpful of you. I'm here to win arguments, not friends. Perhaps I could do it in a different way, but that's not my style.

Given that I've only been wrong once since I got here and admitted it when given a verifiable source you're lying. I've also provided sources for everything I've said. And you can't point out a single hole in my arguments. Try again.

<BZZZZ> Thanks for playing we've got some lovely parting gifts for you. I have repeated myself only when it was clear someone was so thickheaded they didn't get it the first time. I've never used "distraction techniques" either. Perhaps you can provide an example of this as proof unless you want to do what you're falsely accusing me of doing.

Nobody is listening to me Einstein. They are reading what I've written and nobody is forcing them to do so. You don't speak or write for everyone on this board. And even if you did it wouldn't matter to me.

I've got nothing against you Cairo. You seem like a fairly decent person. I'm just trying to point out that the bible isn't a "historical journey" or "instructions by god" him/her self as you claim. But since you're so hung up on providing "proof" I'm sure you can provide measurable and verifiable proof that god exists. Not the deeds you attribute to god like, "look at the world around us", but evidence that an actual entity of god exists. Perhaps you can provide measurable and verifiable proof that gods own hand wrote the bible and not the hands of men.

I'm all about providing proof now. Give me some actual evidence that isn't circular like most Christian logic. Give me some physical proof that the entity of god exists (not deeds you attribute to god) and I will become a Christian.

And since you want me to provide bible verses despite the fact that we both agree it won't change your mind here goes.

Jesus and the separation of church and state:

John 2:13-16

Matthew 22:19-22


Jesus and public prayer:

Matthew 6:5-6

Matthew 26:36


Jesus and hypocrisy:

Matthew 7:3-5


I could go on and on but we've both agreed that there is no point.

I got a question, who exactly what the post directed at. I'm confused, you quoted me, then stated that you have nothing against Cairo. :confused:

It doesn't say "guns", it says "arms". Should we also assert our right to an unlimited amount of flamethrowers, rocketlaunchers, grenades, and nuclear missles?

I think you should have special a permit for nukes. Possibly a waiting period also. All the others hardware though should only require the PICS (Pa instant check system) and an ATF4473 (the yellow sheet you fill out for a firearm purchase).

In many states you can still legally own machine guns/full auto rifles. The requirements are a clean record (no felonies) the fee for the special permit ($200) and you must actually purchase a full auto to get the permit. The full autos arent cheap, 2k to 100k.

I dont know if the ATF grants permits for "destructive devices" such as handgrenades.

Permit, schmermit. It's my constitutional right!

Cairo, I heartily disagree with you on the Texas history book revisions! ¡Pienso su magnífico! Thanks for letting me know about it! Often I only hear about revisions that attack evolution or that insist on bluring the nudity of landmark statues.:)

Nukes are a little different from the other weapons. Where exactly would I "target practice" with a nuke? It may be our constitutional right to own them but the cost and power makes them too impractical.

A good 155mm howitzer on a mobile platform might be nice though. I think they are called Palladins. They sell for (? guessing ?) 2.5 mil a piece. PLUS you get machine guns with the package. Now this is practical, the nukes are not.

<a href="http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/land/m109a6.htm"> Now this is a good investment. </a>Good commincations sysems, NBC (nuclear,biological,chemical) protection, and it totally eliminates your parking worries. What better vehicle could you ask for in this current environment of terrorism

Thanks for pointing that link out warch, since Cairo refused to bother to do so. I have no idea what she sees wrong with providing a supplement that will connect students to history. Would she care to explain?

In all fairness, when I did a few searches for the "rewrite" deal, the link to the Houston situation was all I could find.

Allow me to introduce you to a new bimodal probability distribution. The two modes are tagged "Slim" and "None", and "Slim" just left town. This is the function that describes the probablity that your dick will ever be close enough to my mouth to be slapped out of it.

That's possibly the lamest backpedal I've ever heard. Don't struggle--that's quicksand you're in.

Maggie, that's just too funny.

I WANT ONE!!!!!

On second thought ... I would like TWO please. You never know when you'll need a spare.

It may be funny, but she's wrong. You're wrong. I'm wrong. We're all wrong. We can only hope to be as cool as Radar...he's going to lead a one-man revolution.

Glad to see you're finally coming around Sycamore. j/k. :D

At least things are starting to lighten up in here.

maggie, that is easily one of the funniest goddamn posts ive read in a while.

~james

Cairo, I'm feeling the tug of conscience for some cheap shots I've lobbed toward you. It was bad form on my part to go personal and I appologize.
You do push my buttons.:)

dave,
Thanks for the info. I appreciate the correction. :)

Oh, I understood what you said, basically you said that interpretation of God's words and will are fine...even though The Bible forbids interpretation and demands TRANSLATION.

Revelation, 22:18 and 19
"For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book:
And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of the prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the Holy city, and from the things which are written in this book."

See? Interpretation is a lawyers term used to add to and subtract from the truth to get the guilty off the hook. If you don't know the difference between interpretation and translation, you happen to be part of the problem.

Radar,
I've already proven existence of Historical remains found by scientists, and our Founding Fathers agreed that the 10 Commandments are instructions by God...Proving that God's words and will as written in the book of prophecy is true, is proving that God exists.

BTW, I'm not Christian.

What would you classify yourself as?

To get this verse required translation. Which in itself requires interpretation? Why becuase all languages have different words, these words mean different things. Some languages just don't contain a word that means the same as another word in another language. Therefore it is up to the translator to come up with the best choice of words that carry the same meaning. This means that sometimes meaning can be changed. Why? Humans make mistakes.

Translate a phrase to another language and back again using an online translator of some sort, the words don't come out right, there is different grammar, phrases that make no sense. When a human does this they take the time to rephrase the language so it makes sense, and through this interpretation meanings change.

warch,
I'm always happy to inform...even if it is a different subject altogether. The important thing is knowledge...knowledge is power.

So, you really disagree "wholeheartedly" with me when I say that our schools should teach FACTS only, and leave the "feel good" opinions alone.

I've already had to deprogram my son(7 years old) when he came home from school devastated that the world was going to end because loggers cut down trees!!!! Upsetting and distressing my son with their agenda-driven OPINIONS, and the fact that I teach him reading, writing, and math because their too busy with homosexuality, trees, recycling, and condoms! When a child graduates from High School unable to fill out an application and not well-rounded...it's time to scrap the Social(ism) experiment!

Hey warch, good debate pushes buttons because when the arguments make sense they threaten our views.
If the argument doesn't push your buttons it's because it makes no sense and is not a threat.
Don't worry, I've been called a lot worse by a lot more threatened. ;)

So, global warming is just an opinion, eh?

Global warming is an opinion and the bible is fact.
Right.

*pauses for a few seconds*

Condoms?!?! *gasp* next they'll suggest the pill and that'll make baby jesus cry!

Right........