I'm so sorry, glatt. :(

I think funeral services, or visitations, are for the living, the loved ones still here. Having said that, however, very often these things come up when something else important is planned. And it's a big distance to go; it's not like it's in town.

Could you send an arrangement, or cards to your niece and nephew? Maybe a phone call? I think in this circumstance that is more than acceptable and welcome.

And you and your son will relish those trips for the rest of your life: I bet your ex sis-in-law would want you to be able to do those things with your family. Life does go on.

And fuck cancer. :(

Don't go. Call them. They will understand.

Sorry for your loss, glatt.

And yeah, what Monster said.

Maybe you could call your niece and nephew and ask if they'd like to come spend some time at your place after everything is done and dusted? Use the money for that instead. I would think they'd understand, and probably even not really care if you're there or not anyway. They'll be in grief, and they still have their Dad, so he'll be the one they'll be leaning on. (I assume he's going) When it all comes down to it, there'll probably be a lot of people there if she was youngish and the kids will probably have friends go along to support them too.

Don't feel bad. Just let them know they're in your thoughts and that you'd love to see them as soon as they'd like to get together with you.

I called and had a really good talk with them. I'm not going, and it's fine.

Glatt, sorry for your loss, and glad that the niece and nephew are OK with you not going to the funeral. I think the idea of inviting them to come and visit you for a while is a good one.

My hand tremors have gotten worse recently, to the point that I feel I need to discuss it with my neurologist the next time I see him. Rationally, I'm pretty sure it's the same benign aspect of epilepsy that it's always been, and they are only worse right now because I'm not getting enough sleep (which in turn is because I am acting like a child and refusing to go to bed at the appropriate time, as if somehow tomorrow will be magically different and I won't have to get up at 5:45 after all.)

But.

The irrational hypochondriac part of me keeps shouting from the back that this is the first sign of early onset Parkinson's. I have it on both sides of my family--not early onset specifically, just regular old Parkinson's--but one of those cases is the uncle who used to only have mild epilepsy like me.

No doubt lack of sleep is making the anxiety worse too. Oh, and, I woke up with a sore throat, which is just pissing me off. I would go to bed right now, but Mr. Clod isn't home yet.

That would upset me too. Sorry, Clodfobble. I hope you're just tired. Go to bed as soon as the Mr. gets home.

Glatt,
a) I am sorry to hear about your ex sister in law's passing.
b) A moth ate your only suit? That must have been a big ass, hungry moth. It was probably a good thing you weren't wearing it at the time.

Clodfobble.
a) I am sorry about ur tremor. That sucks.
b) Just say NO to Parkinsons.

Go to the doc. Put your mind at ease Clod. I'm sure it's just lack of sleep, so also, GO TO BED!

It's a choo-mah

now, calls from bill collectors, asking me my number, my info, and "are you married to a mrs tink?"

fuck. no. stop bothering me about this shit, I don't want to have anything to do with mrs tink, leave me alone.

Oh man, that sucks. Those phone calls are never really going to go away until she pays the debt, or dies. Mr. Clod's brother has tons of bills in collection, and about every 1-2 years, the debt gets sold to a new collection agency, and they diligently re-run all the potential paths to find him, including us. We tell them he's never lived with us, and we haven't heard from him in years and honestly wouldn't know where to find him, and they are polite and cross us off the list... but then a year later, the calls start again.

Get your sleep and talk to your Doc. Don't screw around with this stuff.