The Cellar - The Sex Thread

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Slimming Down Heats Up Sex Lives

Not to change the subject--I find the current topic very informative. I am taking copious mental notes. But it is the Sex Thread, and this article caught my attention. No real surprises here, but a good confirmation of my empirical experience.

Especially this, more insight into her head.

Quote:

Women reported more difficulty than men, Binks said. "For women, not wanting to be seen undressed and not enjoying sexual activity were particularly troublesome," he said.

Maybe if I hump my Big Bear Vibrator enthusiastically enough I'll lose weight?!

c'mere girl, i'll help ya!

Quote:

Originally Posted by plthijinx

c'mere girl, i'll help ya!

Hey! if you're in Memphis--! Just fly a bit north! I'm right on the corner! :love:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

Maybe if I hump my Big Bear Vibrator enthusiastically enough I'll lose weight?!

Yes but it will all be water weight.

My ex-girlfriend gave me a copy of this book.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/08...CMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...books&n=507846

Code:

ACTIVITY      CALORIES BURNED     ACTIVITY        CALORIES BURNED

-----------------------------------------------------------------

 

REMOVING CLOTHES:                 ORGASMIC INTENSITY SCALE:

With partner's consent.....12     Shoes flew off...............35

Without partner's consent.187     Expression didn't change....1/2

                                  Orchestra swelled.............6

UNHOOKING BRA:                    Birds sang

Using two calm hands........7      Large birds..................7

Using one trembling hand...36      Small birds..................3

                                  Earth moved..................30

 

Lifting partner............15     PULLING OUT:

Dragging partner on floor..16     After orgasm................1/2

Using skateboard............3     A few moments before orgasm.500

 

ACHIEVING ERECTIONS:              PENIS ENVY:

For normal healthy man....2.5     For woman.....................3

Losing erection............14     For men......................72

Searching for it..........115

                                  GUILT:

PUTTING ON CONDOM:                Despite no formal training,

With erection.............1.5     orgasm comes easily..........53

Without erection..........300     You're enjoying sex,despite the

                                  fact that other people are

INSERTING DIAPHRAGM:              starving......................2

If the woman who does it is       Sex on your lunch hour........3

Experienced.................6     Putting it on expense account..

Inexperienced..............73                                  20

If a man does it..........680     AGGRAVATION:

Add (5) calories for retrieving   Partner keeps showing plants..5

it from across the room.          Partner insists on cuddling the

                                  dog during foreplay..........14

 

ACCORDING TO NATIONALITY:         Partner visiting bathroom for

Italian- Man on top,woman in      7th time.....................10

kitchen....................26     Partner taking phone calls....7

Russian- Woman on bottom,         Partner making phone calls...40

Man getting permission.....55

American- Both on top......60     GETTING CAUGHT:

                                  By partner's spouse..........60

SIDE EFFECTS INTERCOURSE:         By your spouse..............100

Bouncing....................7     Trying to explain............55

Sliding around..............9     Trying to remain calm.......100

Serious skidding...........12     Leaping out of bed...........75

Whiplash...................27     Getting dressed in one motion

                                                              500

                                  Thanking partner quickly......2

ORGASM:

Real.......................27

Faked.....................160

Regarding improvised devices:

A couple of years ago there was quite a bit of a furor over a Harry Potter Vibrating Broom.

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Regarding improvised devices:

A couple of years ago there was quite a bit of a furor over a Harry Potter Vibrating Broom.

Yup. Now Mommy and the kids have something else to fight over.

Anyone ever have sex while suspended by large fish-hooks that were suspended from the ceiling?
Talk about "Fly The Friendly Skies".

On top of the NYC subway cars during rush hour.

On the top of the mausolem of Marie Laveau, the "Witch Queen" of New Orleans.

In a cell at Alcatraz.

In the last tram car at Disneyland. You got to be careful with that one.
Mickey gets mad when you fuck around in his park.

On the roof of "Playcade" in Atlanic City at 3 in the morning.

My wife loves when we go on vacations.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

Hey! if you're in Memphis--! Just fly a bit north! I'm right on the corner! :love:

[hijack] eh, i was only there for a couple of hours, my passenger had a speech at the university...... :( landed back in H-town around 1:30 a.m. to be at work at 7:00) [/hijack]

Speaking of toys, I found this intriguing.

The double entendre potential is very high:

Your words move me.
I'll give a buzz for lunch.
Talk dirty to me.
Reach out and touch someone.
etc.

Isn't it about time for all you ladies to start posting pics of your own favorite toys?

Speaking of toys, I found this intriguing.

or time it so she is in a meeting and figuer out how to text the 1812 ovature ,
buzzbuzzbbuzz , BOOOM ,buzzz buzzz buzzz ,BOOOOOM !!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

Isn't it about time for all you ladies to start posting pics of your own favorite toys?

I did...

SD, didn't you intend pictures in situ? :lol: