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Shawnee. I didn't and don't think you heartless. And yes I was being condescending, but with respect, it was in response to this condescension:
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Again, it adds to the idea that people who get bullied are drawing the bully. I didn't play the game. I have never been a quiet victim. |
I might point out at this time that I have bullied as well. In my defense I considered had reason. Fuck with my friends and I can be unpleasant. And creative. Impulses and ways of interacting which I have long since trained myself out of. Except in politics, obviously.
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I see that Shawnee is trying to understand why she wasn't bullied when others were, not that she's being condescending.
Bullying sucks and shouldn't be tolerated, but it is. A place of solace away from bullying is a good thing, but won't really solve the problem. |
This thread has made me sad: sad that people are so cruel, sad that the world can be so cold. This is a feeling I've struggled against since I can remember remembering; I've never understood that about people.
Dana, I hope you know I have the utmost respect for you. I certainly don't think you ever "asked for it" and I am sorry to give that impression. My experience is totally different. Yes, I am proud of how strong I can be. Yes, I am constantly dismayed by my weakness. Now give me some names and addresses so I can go kick some ass. ;) |
*chuckles* Shawnee, I know that.
This isn't really about me. What I am, though, is a person you know, and as such I hope that some of the assumptions that get made when it's a stranger (like in that article) are avoided. The only thing that's annoyed me in this thread was the speed with which that girl and her family were labelled complicit in her victimisation. There is a culture (in my country and in yours I believe) of machismo when it comes to bullying. One is not supposed to 'lie down and take it', one is supposed to 'fight back. Those who become victims of bullying are perceived as weak. They must be weak, because they were the ones who got bullied. It's pervasive. It feeds into every field in life. Whatever is overtly put into the culture in terms of telling someone if you're being bullied, and it's not your fault if you are being bullied; none of that outweighs the deep cultural identification of the bullied as weak and unworthy. Darwinism in action. This is how many people see it. That macho culture makes it very difficult for people to speak out. Me? Oh I'll speak out. I am unbullyable. But only because I got innoculated young :P |
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Personally what you all are talking about is way past bullying - its harassment. My definition of bullying would be more akin to what (no name) has been done here to certain posters...relatively harmless poking or mocking. I believe I even mentioned this in my 2nd post. |
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Hey Merc - Go choke on yer popcorn or just STFU - mmmkay?
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**gagging**
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c-man:
:notworthy: |
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I think you meant gagging and I hope it was on your popcorn. As you were. Oh and make sure you wash your hands before you touch the keyboard. |
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Bullied for most of my school life. Made me HATE school. Stopped going most of the time until college.
Most of the bullies were girls. It was that kind of town. I was taught to NEVER hit a girl. My father wasn't and I wasn't going to be him, no matter what. Bullies are the lowest form of life in school. My only recompense, if I can call it that, albeit too late, was the fact that the 3 major trangressors did not fare too well. One was killed by her boyfriend. One had four kids, on welfare and no father in sight. The 3rd has been in and out of rehab and institutions since HS. |
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