we are doing back to back safaris this time so some of the blokes will be tired from the travel (bit of whisky hits the spot), we set camp at one tribe of Internet natives at a time and strike out to explore.
this does seem a friendly group i am quite taken with the hospitality and whiskey is always a proper pick me up for an intrepid explorer.

i don't recall the name but the academy sends out new fellows after every trip so it is bloody hard to tell

we like visitors.

We must have you for dinner. Maybe when the rest of you arrive.

Watch out, man! He's just trying to soften you up for some nefarious purpose. Or somebody else's nefarious purpose.

We have extras.

Spoken like a true native. :D

not the first cannibal tribe we have visited , but i will send word back to the team to warn them, now where is that porter ( you don't suppose he has already been eaten do you?)

I don't think being eaten is the big problem. Remain seated, and nobody should get hurt.

No sudden movements.

attempts to flee

Stopped by natives with shields and spears, no blood drawn, yet.

well, when you phrase it 'attempt to flee' it seems like you don't think you'll succeed. anyway, at this point, here around the fire it's much safer than trying to traverse the wild in the dark. You could fall into a pit, or get bit by a snake, or buttfucked in the mouth by Flint if you go out there now.

merc, wolf....where is your sense of hospitality?

please don't eat the men in the funny hats. It's not nice. Do you want the genital cuff again?

I start with eating the heart, that way their soul can't haunt me. I'll leave the ball sack for others.

hunker down in camp and keep the blunderbuss close at hand, there was a native handing out whisky earlier if you cant find him i will break into the gin ration early...

backs away from the spears and helps get the water to boil for tea