The Cellar

The Cellar (http://cellar.org/index.php)
-   Home Base (http://cellar.org/forumdisplay.php?f=2)
-   -   Guns don't kill people .... (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=24412)

Lamplighter 12-23-2012 09:26 AM

The NRA has finally solved the fiscal and unemployment crisis for the US.

By putting a armed guard in every school, that would be about 100,000 new jobs,
and since a single guard per school just won't due it could easily up that number to 150,000.
But that's not the end of this very imaginative job creation program.

Just as we need armed federal marshals on planes, we need a armed "good guy" on every school bus.
Now the multiplier would be different for each school, but let's assume 10 buses/school.
That is at least 1,000,000 part time jobs... without having to pay medical benefits !

But then, the insane shooters are not only active during weekdays.
There are the churches where children gather on weekends.
Those 1M part-timers can even have 1 more day's work each week on Sundays,
and in some communities even on a few on Saturdays,
and for the Baptists, there are the Wednesday night Prayer Meetings.
And don't forget all the summer-time church socials, VBS's, summer camps, etc.
This means year-round employment, not like the vacations school teacher get.

But maybe individual armed guards are not the complete answer,
so private companies (the job creators) would be have to be formed.

Also, we certainly can not create all these jobs without some sort of official organization and oversight.
Relying on local resources would create a hodge-podge of programs, and certainly leave gaps in coverage.

The NRA has volunteered it's resources, and Wayne LaPierre sounds as though
he would not refuse the job of Under Secretary for Domestic Defense in the Dept of Homeland Security.
For such an important division, it would take a least 100,000 new federal and state and city employees.
Although that would increase the size of these governments,
it is such a brilliant idea and of such importance, and the federal government
has "so much money", there could not possibly be an significant political objection.

Once this program is fully implemented (next week) we could expect to discover gaps in coverage,
such as charter schools, private schools, public and private libraries, etc.,
and the program can be expanded to a fully, effective force. (by Easter).

Unfortunately, such a large force of armed guards would eventually be seen by many as an Obama conspiracy.
But don't worry, the NRA can establish and provide a separate and independent,
armed and trained force to protect America from an Obama-guard take-over.
They even can have a program to train boys and girls for future needs... and call them the "NRA Youth Guards"

ETA: I failed to include movie theaters... sorry Colorado, how soon we forget.

Shawnee123 12-23-2012 09:43 AM

We'll never have an itty-bitty government at this rate! Spend, spend. That's always their solution.

Irony, it's what's for dinner. And midnight snack. Maybe a quick breakfast.

footfootfoot 12-23-2012 09:59 AM

NRA chief: If putting armed police in schools is crazy, 'then call me crazy'

Well... There you have it.

Quote:

(CNN) -- The National Rifle Association made clear Sunday it will not budge on its opposition to any new gun laws, despite heated criticism of the organization's response to the Connecticut school massacre.
I understand it's all about lobbying but their rhetoric makes it sound like they are the ones who decide what the laws are going to be.

richlevy 12-23-2012 10:59 AM

Of all of the leaders of 'mainstream' political organizations in the US, I've always considered LaPierre to be the most batshit crazy. He's like the Ahmadinejad of the 501's.

Maybe the NRA should swap leadership with NAMBLA. At least then it would be in their best interests to stop the massacre of children.

sexobon 12-23-2012 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lamplighter (Post 844983)
... Ba-a-a-a, ba-a-a-a, ba-a-a-a ...

[translation in bold mine]

That's the price of being sheep.

Mutton, it's what's for dinner. And midnight snack. Maybe a quick breakfast.

Shawnee123 12-23-2012 11:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by richlevy (Post 845013)
Of all of the leaders of 'mainstream' political organizations in the US, I've always considered LaPierre to be the most batshit crazy. He's like the Ahmadinejad of the 501's.

Maybe the NRA should swap leadership with NAMBLA. At least then it would be in their best interests to stop the massacre of children.

Srsly. Chock FULL O' Nuts!

Lamplighter 12-23-2012 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sexobon (Post 845016)
[translation in bold mine]
That's the price of being sheep.<snip>

...he said sheepishly.

sexobon 12-23-2012 01:13 PM

It was said modestly. That anyone can live as long as you have and not recognize the difference is disconcerting. Lamplighter, not one brain left in his poor old head. Maybe Santa will bring you one!

Stormieweather 12-24-2012 06:25 PM

Went to the range today with my son and daughter to do some shooting. Place was absolutely packed! Not sure if paranoia or holiday time off was the reason.

ZenGum 12-24-2012 06:49 PM

They had nowhere else to go. The local mental hospital had just had to discharge them all, because of funding cuts.

Spexxvet 12-26-2012 08:32 AM

Sexobon has been insulting people across multiple threads, and not in the poke-fun-at-you way. Apparently, if you don't agree with him, you're broken.

Flint 12-26-2012 08:37 AM

We're you a tattle-tale in school, also?

Trilby 12-26-2012 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum (Post 845198)
They had nowhere else to go. The local mental hospital had just had to discharge them all, because of funding cuts.

that would be funny if it wasn't so fucking true.

Spexxvet 12-26-2012 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint (Post 845331)
We're you a tattle-tale in school, also?

If I were a gun owner, I could have just shot him and 25 other people, but I'm not.

I guess I was just wondering, in a discreet way, why Ibby gets shit, but Sexobon doesn't.

infinite monkey 12-26-2012 09:35 AM

I didn't understand why it was ok for him to shit on me, not in a pokey fun way, when i expressed sincere horror in the immediate wake of the shootings. Shit on for feeling, for caring, for expressing? Fuck that, I am human.

And I also don't get Flint's constant need to check in seemingly just to admonish dwellers in a tsk tsk 'at children' kind of way. I'm insulted FOR the targets of that crap.

I liked his Amish
Better than his admonish


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:54 PM.

Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.