:lol2:

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Also: Is that an inverse Pac-Man shirt?

Our typing monkey...

I read the monkey's writing in James Earl Jones' voice.

Perhaps John Gielgud.

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You'll be rich...

A shopfitter and his apprentice are putting the finishing touches to a new shop.
Pleased with their progress they stop for a break. As the sun is shining the older fitter suggests they sit in the shop window for their tea. But he warns, "I bet some thicko stops by and asks what we're selling."

Sure enough, as they sit and sip, a Yorkshireman ambles up and asks what the shop sells.
With a sidelong look at his apprentice, the experienced shopfitter says, "Thickos."

"Eeee," says the Yorkshiremen, "you'll do well here. Look, only just opened and you're already down to your last two!"

What is a "Thickos"?

A thick witted person = Thicko. More than one = Thickos.

Or were you being ironic?

I truly did not know, it is a British-ism I had never heard before. It was not in the book I got for Christmas last year.

I thought she'd developed a lithp.

Then it would have been 'thopfitter' which I don't know what that is either. ;)

What that is you just don't.

Two men were out playing golf on a nice Saturday afternoon. They were getting frustrated, though, because the two women who were playing right in front of them were quite slow and were holding up the men's game. "Don't they know they're supposed to let us play through?" asked the first man. The other man shook his head. "I'm going to go ask them if we can play through" said the first man, emphatically "Enough is enough". He started walking over toward the women, but as he got close, he suddenly turned around and came back, white as a ghost. "Oh God" he said to his friend "This is awful. You're going to have to ask those women if we can play through. You see, one of them is my wife, and the other is my mistress". The other man shrugged, and said "No sweat". He walked over toward the women, and just as he was getting close, turned around and came running back to his pal. His eyes wide open, he said "Small world!"

Snicker...