Thank you Wolf . I found that pic a while back and have been waiting for an oppertuinity to use it .

Gwennie ...

You ARE irresponsible. There's no other word for it.

Ten days short of your 90 day chip you relapsed. Worse yet, you got behind the wheel of a vehicle and didn't just drive drunk. You, by your own admission blacked out. I have a sneaking suspicion that this was not your first experience with this particular effect of overuse of alcohol.

Welcome back to day one.

Do not use the fact of your acceptance of your alcoholism as an excuse. That is lower, IMHO, than just being a drunk.

The whole point of the AA system is that you are to accept responsibilty for yourself and for your actions. You failed to "recognize" your relapse when you ordered your first drink? That you continued to drink to the point of insensibility is worse than sad.

You got a black eye, and are out a car.

As has been pointed out this is a far better outcome than could have occurred. From your report you aren't dead and neither is anybody else.

You are in the very early stages of recovery. You have a lot of work to do. You are thinking and talking like a dry drunk at this point, and you're not all that dry.

As was suggested, get out the big book. Start the 12 steps over again. Establish a relationship with a sponsor. She will help you with this stuff. Find morning and evening meetings to attend.

Do the work.

Stop making excuses.

Wow. I sound like a pathetic loser.

Actually, I've been married for 22 years. Now you're wondering why was I going out alone? I thought I was meeting people. My husband goes out with his guy friends. But, these people were not my close friends, who wouldn't have skipped out without calling. I think my husband is going to keep me on a short leash from now on.

Yes, I have an 18 yo son, and a 14 yo daughter. My husband is a musician, a classical pianist. I got my PhD in CS in 1984.

What kind of pathetic 48 yo woman is a Gwannabe? My old forum site was half fictional; there was even a guy who always posted in the third person. Perhaps my schtick doesn't work so well at this site which is more reality based.

I've worked at 6 different startup companies. So, I really admire Gwen Stefani and No Doubt for not giving up when they first flopped. They worked hard for 10 years before they saw any success at all.

One of these startups was highly successful. I was the CTO of a company that started from nothing, we built our product, and just one year later the company was acquired for $90MM. The product that I designed and built (with staff) became the third product line for a major Internet company. I'm no Donna Dubinsky, but I did a good job there.

It's hard to describe the kinds of pressure that great success brings. Before this I drank like an average person. So, for me, alcoholism didn't begin until after I was 40.

Yes, I need a sponsor. But, I can't use a 30 yo kid that starting drinking when she was 11 yo. Fortunately, I recently met a professional woman in her fifties that I can relate to. Most of the women at AA meetings talk about what kind of bottoms they reached. I am such a girl scout in comparison.

I blew my early retirement on starting my own company. Had success as an employee, then wanted to take my career to the next level. Nov 1999 was not a good time to start an Internet company. Recently I signed a major company to a minor deal, and got an inadequate offer from another to acquire my company.

This offer looks good to my husband who likes the idea of me getting a salary again after none for four years. Since he's a musician, he has limited earning potential. He says that I'm not earning my potential now.

And, Wolf, never mistake yourself for a therapist. They may sound like excuses, but my therapist had me recognize why I failed after 80 days in order to help avoid it again. What I am now doing is 90 meetings in 90 days, getting a sponsor, and getting serious about the work I have to do.

It's too easy for me to bury myself in tech work; I'm good at that. I need to get good at recovery.

- Dr. Gwennie!, Internet millionaire drunk.

Nov 1999 was not a good time to start an Internet company.

Me too!

He says that I'm not earning my potential now.

Me too! She told me so over and over and over. Thank god she's gone and, rid of that anchor, I can now start to realize my potential.

Thanks for taking the big leap to Cellar reality. The real picture of a real human being is so much better.

That's cool, dude. I may have a new small client for you if this person decides to start their company.

Actually, I get a lot of support at home for my business. But, this is the year we run out of cash if the income doesn't rise. (Although we paid off our mortgage already.)

I'm sorry i used a half-fictional style that wasn't right here. As I mentioned, that's the way it was in my old forum site, but that place turned into daily fighting, so I left.

The road to cellar reality was kinda rocky; I probably should have waited until they put me on zoloft or whatever it'll be. :)

Sometimes they're Photoshopped.

hey...... be careful what you say about wolf. she's got her head on straighter than most, and to me, that's more therapist-able than oh yeah, BTW, i can make money, but i also put everyone in danger.

here's a clue: maybe you can make money, but if you plow yer unmanned car over a toddler, yer still not quite as good as dirt.

stop giving us your resume......... we don't care. we're behind you if you're taking responsibility, but not if you're trying to prove your worth by having a lot of cash in yer pocket when ya kill a kid.

and not if ya jump wolf.

RATS!:D

now, bruce, i am COMPLETELY scandalized.
:blush: