Why Jim... :blush:

That hug was for shaw. Give it back. You only get those half hug, half shoulder press deals with one arm between us. Don't whine. It's your own damn fault, mr two-handed-ass-grabberson

Well, the answer is in (drum roll please): I WILL GO.

Of course it's upsetting, but as you know I expected it and even wanted it. When faced right up to it, it's scary. I know I couldn't go on like that, though. I have to keep reminding myself that (as it was eloquently put by a friend) that I didn't fail at that job, that job failed me.

I went back over some of my old documentation last night, and honestly I'm surprised it went on this long.

There seems to be more I should say but it's really a jumble in my head right now.

Thanks to everyone who listened to me vent over the years.

Just: where now? I have some ideas of things I'd like to do, but I honestly can't say I want to work in the public arena anymore. I know i have time to think about it.

Though I was urged to post what I texted last night:

Commute: GONE
Fat-rendering plant smell of (city): GONE
Idiots who ram into my car in downtown (city): GONE
Chance of being subjected to a sociopath mass killing: GREATLY REDUCED

Sigh, no one never said nuttin' would be easy, I s'pose.

Not to jump on your happy.
But I handed in my notice today too.
Synchronicity.
I have a lot of the same questions as you.

Good luck babba.
I reckon you'll make it.

Happy? No, not really. I'd have liked for things to work out, that the hope and excitement I felt at the beginning would have panned out.

So we can commisserate together.

And I reckon we'll both make it. :)

p.s. I love your Spinal Tap sig!

I gotta big bottom :)

We'll compare notes at the end of the year.
Make up a points system. See who wins.
I don't mind losing to you, I just want to be here to still play the game at Christmas

Job, family status (haters), photos posted (haha) new skills, lovers lost (minus points - but I know I'll be okay on that front) photos posted (haha again) new authors discovered, weight lost, money won, love and love and love.

I've got a panto to go to, you know.
Seriously, pull off a bank heist and join us.

At least you don't have that crap hanging over you any more. That torture is gone.

Does the bar by the river need some help? That might be fun for a while.

About bloody time.

Seriously, I'm amazed this dragged on as long as it did without you going postal on the fuckers.

Like getting a tooth pulled, or vomiting when you're nauseous, it's unpleasant but it brings relief. I think you will take a fair while to recover from the headfuck, but no new damage is being inflicted.

You will survive, and something new will develop.

If I may, I suggest either volunteering in a animal care facility (like a dog or cat shelter, but make sure it is a no-kill one; to protect your emotions), or else as a labourer for a gardening service. In general, something a bit practical, a bit nurturing, and low stress.

Although, come to think of it, gardening labourers in your parts probably just say "si, si" a lot, eh?

In the meantime, I offer you this web comic:
http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php...&id=2722#comic

I think gardening is good. Fresh air. Wind in your face. Your back hurts like a bitch but your soul heals.

Good luck, IM. The next door will open.

Zen You and I need to sit around a camp fire drinking and talking one day ,

What he said

Shaw, you know this would be an excellent opportunity to take a little road trip. Get in the car and drive. Go someplace you never had time to go before. make a cellar pilgrimage.

all great thoughts. thanks.

my brother had a line on something for me already. i'm not even officially unemployed yet! i wouldn't mind a little lean time but this would be something i would enjoy.

i have family events to go to tomorrow and sunday, so that'll be good.

Monday: I75N