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-   -   What is the whiniest, most horrible song EVER? (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=25038)

infinite monkey 04-27-2011 08:12 AM

Diary by Bread is pretty whiny, but that was the times. There was also a song about giving your love a cherry or something.

I found her diary underneath a tree.
and started reading about me.
The words began stick and tears to flow.
Her meaning now was clear to see.
The love she'd waited for was someone else not me
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.


Why the fuck was her diary underneath a tree? Was she homeless? Is the image supposed to invoke a fairyland where people floated around and wrote diaries in tree-dotted meadows, with butterflies and rainbows, where happy little bunnies hopped around bringing ribbons of gold?

They were going to call it "She's just not that into you" but they weren't sure that had lasting value, like diaries under trees.

footfootfoot 04-27-2011 09:12 AM

He found her diary under a tree when it fell out of her pocket while he was dragging her into the grave he just dug. You need to listen to all the lyrics.

limey 04-27-2011 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey (Post 727544)
*chuckles* at limey
Do you mean At Seventeen by Janis Ian?

Quote:

Originally Posted by limey (Post 727824)
Oh GAWD yes Infinite Monkey. Cheeeeeezus, what a song! It also pissed me off because at 17 you know NUFFINK and think you know it all and wah wah wah

And then there she is saying "I learned the truth at seventeen ..." so obviously she's older now and she still doesn't get that at 17 you know NUFFINK and think you know it all and wah wah wah. O h m y G A W D, I wish, how I wish I'd not been prompted to remember that song. Cheeeeeeeeeeeezuss. H. Christ.
Thanks guys.

Jill 04-27-2011 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey (Post 727858)

Diary by Bread is pretty whiny, but that was the times. There was also a song about giving your love a cherry or something.

I found her diary underneath a tree.
and started reading about me.
The words began stick and tears to flow.
Her meaning now was clear to see.
The love she'd waited for was someone else not me
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.


Why the fuck was her diary underneath a tree? Was she homeless? Is the image supposed to invoke a fairyland where people floated around and wrote diaries in tree-dotted meadows, with butterflies and rainbows, where happy little bunnies hopped around bringing ribbons of gold?

They were going to call it "She's just not that into you" but they weren't sure that had lasting value, like diaries under trees.

OMG I'm laughing so hard right now. That is a close friend's most loathed songs ever, btw. She'd be laughing her butt off, too, if she read this post. I may have to send it to her!

Sundae 04-27-2011 11:00 AM

Okay, treading on the toes of many British brides and grooms here (they are common first dance songs):

Whiney [sic] Houston's I Will Always Love You - argh! Give my Dolly Parton every day.


The Righteous Brothers' Unchained Melody - droney rather than whiney but it needs to be chained up! I even prefer The Goons' version!


Bryan Adams' Everything I Do - again more droney than whiny but I usually have a decent tolerance for the Canuck moptop. This was just so tedious I was hoping Middle of the Road would become roadkill.

GraceTX 04-27-2011 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jill (Post 727915)
OMG I'm laughing so hard right now. That is a close friend's most loathed songs ever, btw. She'd be laughing her butt off, too, if she read this post. I may have to send it to her!

Bwahahahahaha! If Jill hadn't instructed me to read all the way through before posting, I would've posted that song!

infinite monkey 04-27-2011 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jill (Post 727915)
OMG I'm laughing so hard right now. That is a close friend's most loathed songs ever, btw. She'd be laughing her butt off, too, if she read this post. I may have to send it to her!

Send away. My humor is meant for the masses, beyond the Cellar. I'm waiting to be discovered. ;)

GraceTX 04-27-2011 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jill (Post 727915)
OMG I'm laughing so hard right now. That is a close friend's most loathed songs ever, btw. She'd be laughing her butt off, too, if she read this post. I may have to send it to her!

Bwahahaha! If I hadn't been instructed to read the entire thread before posting, I would have posted the same song as infinite monkey. Jill is right that I hate that song! She knows me too well.

infinite monkey 04-27-2011 05:39 PM

Agreed, Sundae, Dolly over Whitney anyday. I like whitney myself, but it's a little like don mclean instead of roy orbison doing Crying. I mean, come on, it's roy orbison! :)

infinite monkey 04-28-2011 08:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GraceTX (Post 727931)
Bwahahaha! If I hadn't been instructed to read the entire thread before posting, I would have posted the same song as infinite monkey. Jill is right that I hate that song! She knows me too well.

Hahahahahaa...I love it!

*waves at Grace*

casimendocina 04-28-2011 10:48 AM

Michael Jackson's Heal the World.

DanaC 04-28-2011 10:50 AM

Hey there Grace *waves at Grace* Nice to meetcha.

Can I just put forward another entry: this time it's not that it's the whiniest song, so much as the creepiest song. 'Every Breath You Take' by The Police. Stalky song.

Sundae 04-28-2011 11:30 AM

But that's why I love it! Because it is an obsessive stalker song, and intended to be.
I was gutted when it was turned into the "I'll Be Missing You" saccharine bleurgh.
From the sinister to the tooth-decay.

But Sting apparently LIKED it?!
I think he was scared if he said otherwise, faux ganstas would shoot up his house while he was having tantric sex.
The cowardly Geordie shite.

Undertoad 04-28-2011 11:35 AM

Bri is still in the lead with Seasons in the Sun, and post #2 BTW.

infinite monkey 04-28-2011 11:37 AM

Who died and left you in charge of the sappiest song? Have you not HEARD that Bruno Mars travesty?

:lol:

FIELD OF 64?


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