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-   -   Tasteless Jokes (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=2408)

crazybuoy 06-22-2010 02:24 AM

The top ten signs that someone is using your e-mail account

10. "Honey, why is an 18-wheeler from Amazon.com backing into our driveway?"

9. One Secret Service agent is sitting on your head while another is slapping cuffs on you.

8. Apparently, your flame war with DonCorleone@mafia.com is about to turn ugly.

7. When you log on, your computer says "You've got lawsuits!"

6. You're suddenly getting more Spam than the Hormel outlet store.

5. Sotheby's says the Rembrandt is yours and that you now owe them $71,000,000 and change.

4. You now have 130,000 ClubTop5 subscriptions and the list moderator is on the cover of Business Week.

3. Terse "Knock it off, Oedipus" e-mail from your Mom.

2. Your wife calls you at the office to report that Pogdi, your Pakistani mail-order bride, has arrived.

1. "The resistance welcomes your involvement. Your contact information has been forwarded to a local insurgent who will bring supplies and reinforcements to you immediately."

GunMaster357 06-22-2010 02:50 AM

If it is true that you are what you eat then I am....





.... a pussy.

GunMaster357 06-22-2010 03:56 AM

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room?





A: One... If you throw it hard enough

GunMaster357 06-24-2010 04:11 AM

Pick the odd one out: a woman, a washing machine, a toaster and the garden hose?






The toaster, the rest leak when they're fucked.

trailerman83 06-28-2010 01:33 PM

how did canada get its name?
You take a C eh, and an N eh, and you take a D eh

trailerman83 06-28-2010 01:37 PM

view from a black man in a well

GunMaster357 06-30-2010 03:10 AM

Q: Why does the bride always wear white?




A: Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.

classicman 06-30-2010 07:32 AM

niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice

Gravdigr 07-02-2010 02:25 PM

1 Attachment(s)
.

GunMaster357 07-05-2010 02:59 AM

Q: Why do men have assholes?

A: So they won't be total pricks.

GunMaster357 08-30-2010 06:45 AM

Q: What does Kurt Cobain and Michaelangelo have in common?














A: They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

classicman 08-30-2010 08:17 AM

... did.

Rhianne 08-30-2010 08:57 AM

That was awful - but it made me laugh!

I told my daughter, she's in the shower now and I can still hear her giggling.

sullage 08-30-2010 09:04 AM

How are Michael Phelps and Hitler different?


Phelps can finish a race.

be-bop 08-30-2010 05:47 PM

There was a news report that
the flood in Pakistan was the act of a
Suicide Plumber


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