The Cellar - Happy Birthday!

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- - Happy Birthday! (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=6685)

Oh, good...the thread has skewed to birthday stuff not related to Cellar Dwellars. It is the perfect time to share this, then.

Today is my son's 25th birthday. How strange it is to think that he is now the age I was when he was born. Stranger still is his difficult life, and how he reacts to it. I often get emails from him lamenting his lot, but today, being his birthday, perhaps I felt the need to respond with a bit more empathy, with something that might communicate my admiration and love for him. What follows is his email, and then my reply.

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From Stephen: "You know what dad, I'm 25 years old but my brain sometimes still feels like I'm still 21 or 18 years old.....why? I know what to do at home, bills, food, cleaning up shit around here, always remembering to give clifton his gas money and other things that I have to do or things you and mom needs me to do if you ask. But I still feel like I'm 18 or 21 Y.O., why?

Maybe I'm being scared of being older or something like that, I don't know father, I don't know."
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"Happy Birthday, son. We all feel a bit reflective and odd when we gain another year, and it is perfectly natural to reflect on where we are at on those days. Try and remember that you are lucky to be alive and living a mostly normal life at all, Steve. We were so close to losing you, so close to having you be an invalid for the rest of your life. You are a miraculous human being who, despite his difficulties, is proof that there is magick and mercy in the Universe. You are a living miracle.

Steve, you are always going to have to work harder than a so-called normal person in order to just get along day to day. Your troubles are going to be many, and your triumphs probably few. You will probably never be wealthy, but you will always be rich...rich in people who love and care about you, and rich with life and a future that will unfold as it should.

It is alright to reflect upon yourself, but don't get down on yourself; don't compare yourself to others. You have little in common with people who haven't endured what you have endured. You cannot judge your life by anyone else's standards. You can only strive each day to do the best that you can. If you know inside yourself that you have given all you have to give each day, you will be rewarded in ways that you may not even understand.

We all love you son, and we are all proud of you. You are an extraordinary person, and you needn't feel badly about yourself in any way."

In memory of a thread that seems to have been created for a 'haiku master' I'd never before heard of:

A Double Posting
Falling threads, like verdegris
Leave trails where they lived.

Elspode, very nice. :thumbsup:
I wonder if he's saying, it's my birthday but I don't feel any different than before?
I find when my birthday comes around, if nothing major has changed, for better or worse, in the last year, then big deal. It doesn't seem to matter if it's not marking some movement, other than time.

Els, Tell Stephen Happy Birthday from me, and also this ... there is nothing wrong with feeling younger than you are. In fact, coming to rely on this is not necessarily a bad thing, unless feeling younger than you are includes a need to do things that should only be done by 18 or 21 year olds ... like anything that is an event in the X-Games.

I shall extend your birthday wishes, Wolf. From experience, what I've learned that Steve means when he mentions "feeling younger" is that he feels immature, like a kid, someone not capable of performing up to the expectations of adulthood. That's why I wanted to give him the chin up message. Steve has a lot of free time for self-talk, and I try to point up the positives in his existence so that he doesn't talk himself into a deep depression.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elspode

what I've learned that Steve means when he mentions "feeling younger" is that he feels immature, like a kid, someone not capable of performing up to the expectations of adulthood.

Listen, you tell Steve that I feel like that all the time, too! And, I'm a good deal older than 25 and I have not endured the things that he has endured.

Beautiful sentiment, Els. You're a terrific dad.

Happy birthday Ernster, you joined up just in time. :D

happy b-day case!

and to all the other people I missed....I only manage to glance at the birthday thing about once every 3 months :( sorry. happy bdays to all.

Kitsune is having a cake day! :beer: :celebrat:

Also of note are Lady Sidhe, who is mostly missing these days, and our pal Saddam! Yaaaaayyy!!! (we need a Kermit smilie).

Happy birthday, Kitsune! (And Lady Sidhe too, if you see this.)

Go, Threatening Three! Lady Sidhe, Kitsune, and Saddam Hussein. With us, the world is a more interesting place.