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-   -   Tasteless Jokes (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=2408)

fargon 06-29-2007 10:09 AM

Q: you know why a womans pussy and asshole are so close together?





A: So you can carry them home like a 6 pak, when they get drunk at a party.:thumb2:

pourbill 06-29-2007 12:02 PM

Why are pubic hairs curly? So they won't poke your eyes out.

Sorry, thought it was a "tasty joke" thread.

Rexmons 06-29-2007 01:39 PM

Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse are standing in divorce court awaiting the judge to begin deliberations when the judge says "Mickey, it says here you want to divorce Minnie because she acts silly. That doesn't sound like a very good reason to me, would you care to explain yourself?" At which point Mickey stands and says in his squeky voice "Your honor, I didn't say I want to divorce her because she acts silly, I said I wanted to divorce her because she's fucking Goofy!"

fargon 06-30-2007 07:16 AM

Why do cowboys have brown noses?


Look'in for love in all the wrong places.

Hime 07-02-2007 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crimson Ghost (Post 359944)
What do Virginia Tech & Mount Everest have in common?
Both are Minus 33 and have killer slopes!
---------------------------------

Why couldn't Chris Benoit kiss his son goodnight?
Because the pillow was in the way.

omg too soon!

lumberjim 07-02-2007 07:19 PM

Q. What's the difference between mayonnaise & semen?
A. Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back of a girl's throat at thirty miles an hour.

lumberjim 07-02-2007 07:19 PM

Q. What's the difference between oral sex & anal sex?
A. Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

Crimson Ghost 07-23-2007 01:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hime (Post 360704)
omg too soon!

Thank you.


---------


Q: What's the difference between a microwave and anal sex?
A: A microwave won't brown your meat.


---------


Guy walks into a bar and says "All lawyers are assholes".
This big fellow in a suit whips around and says "Hey, I resent that."
"Yeah, well are you a lawyer?" he asks.
"No" says the big guy, "I'm an asshole."

elSicomoro 09-05-2007 10:12 AM

Not an actual joke per se, but...

As I was out walking the other night, I thought about playing a practical joke on an Arab family that lives down the street from us.

I thought about taking their shoes and placing them directly in front of their door, sole side up.







(Let's see how many people get this, and how long it takes. :))





(Yes...I know...I'm a sick fuck. :))

queequeger 09-05-2007 10:39 AM

We did something similar to an instructor when I was in Arabic class, we all crossed our legs sole facing the door. When he walked in, we realized we'd forgotten he doesn't get 'humour' per se. He just yelled at us for an hour :(

Spexxvet 09-05-2007 10:58 AM

Ok, what's the meaning of Arabs seeing shoe soles?

queequeger 09-05-2007 11:12 AM

Well, it's more the bottom of your feet. They just see it as a big insult, as it's the dirtiest part of you. Common insult would be Qundirah Ibn Qundirah or something like it. "Shoe son of a shoe."

So if you ever meet an Arab (most get over this one after about a year and they realize we don't think of it as an insult) make it a point to keep both feet facing the floor.

Rexmons 09-05-2007 11:36 AM

It's really more of a manners / etiquette issue. If you were sitting with someone and crossed your legs, it's considered impolite to have the bottom of your shoe facing them. The act of the shoes by themselves being upside down facing them is really nothing.

queequeger 09-05-2007 11:45 AM

I guess that depends on country. I've known an arab to assign an insult to an up-facing shoe.

Urbane Guerrilla 09-06-2007 03:50 AM

Wait a second, people; remember all those Iraqis using the soles of their shoes to smack images of Saddam with? There's a reason they were using their shoes and a reason they were using the soles.

Arab streets have long been unclean places, and that's been true up until quite recently. While not showing shoe sole is a tradition, it is one with a serious material reason. It can be found in Islamic societies that are not by any stretch Arab; keep your soles to yourself in Turkey, too.


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