Make her take you to dinner first.;)

There is no joy greater than outliving your opponents, whether literally or metaphorically. Congratulations!!

In the grand scheme of things, my performance on the awful, horrible really bad night was rated "pretty good." I got a good one month eval from boss-dude, too.

And some additional chaos management tips.

I just woke up from having worked an unexpected double last night. By "unexpected," I mean that the night shift person called off an hour before her shift. I had just gotten into that mode of "all right, only an hour to go and I'm home in bed!"

Not quite.

There were still a bunch of patients in the lobby waiting for beds at 2300, and hyperguy and I were getting things under control and then ... another patient walks in. Not a walk in, this guy was expected, but he should have been to us LONG before he arrived. Technically, he showed up after his bed was released, but thank FSM, we hadn't put anybody else in it.

So, I had a whole admission to do on top of the "leftovers," which included several discussions with insurance companies. Hyperguy stayed for a little bit, until around 0130 or 0200 or so, I don't really remember anymore.

The one thing that was kind of crucial to my getting out of there before 0700 when the next person would be in was ... being able to forward the phones to another department. Sounds simple, right? I even had some instructions. They were for an older phone, and so were nigh useless.

Hyperguy was so hyper he couldn't remember how to do it.

The nurse manager who sits in the office down the hall didn't know either.

The unit the calls forward to didn't even know that calls forwarded to them.

When I finally finished the last insurance call, I tried every single darn button on the phone.

And found it.

I tested it by calling the main number and the unit that didn't know it answered the phones answered the phone.

Awesome.

I got home around 0600. I think I may have had five hours of sleep.

You're doing a great job.

Yup.

Sometimes things are out of control.
Learning when they are SNAFU is the trick. Because then you don't worry about not coping. You relax and deal with what you can.

Of course I say this is an LSA, not in your job :)
But who's to say you could deal with 31 5-7 year olds?














Who am I kidding?
You could walk through my job asleep.
You'd captivate them all by stripping down and reassembling you weapon.

Sundae, just curious, are you left in charge of the class for long periods? And if you are for any length of time, what first aid certification/training do you have and did the school pay for it?

Sundae, I could NOT manage a room full of ruly 5-7 year olds, much less unruly ones. Give me a room full of nuts or junkies, and I'm in my element.

Most of what I do, even here, is really just a matter of rising above the chaos and not trying to force order onto it, but rather finding it's rhythm and flowing with it without getting caught up in it.

Kind of like swimming out of an undertow, but with people. ;)

Last night I sent an email to IT about a fairly minor issue I've been having. I figured they'd look into it and get back to me ... it's the one that the help desk said they couldn't help me with before. There are workarounds (like walking to the actual fax machine down the hall from my office), but I'd rather be able to fax stuff from my computer. Helps me be lazier.

Darndest thing happened. After 2300 hrs. I was packing up to leave, had cleared out of my desk, and ... phone rings. Nightlady says, "It's for you."

Me? I didn't call anyone.

It was IT. They saw the helpdesk request and were responding to it, to ask some more questions beyond what I'd already included in my email. They are actually going to work on it.

This is so weird to me. My last IT guy was a legacy (his dad had been medical director) with a degree in journalism who didn't own a home computer. What IT guy doesn't own a home computer? That's like a plumber who doesn't own a toilet!

wow. you have IT on duty around the clock? wow. I guess it's a big operation and that working computers are "mission critical".

Typically IT is only available at night when something that actually prevents you from doing your job, like logging in to the medical records charting system. "Little" issues, like I thought mine was (there are physical fax machines available in the department, the only thing it's doing is making me walk down a hallway). That's why I emailed the helpdesk rather than calling the IT emergency line. I'm not having an emergency, I'm having an inconvenience.

Your ability to distinguish the two, nay, your very recognition that there exists the possibility of a difference between the two, is greatly appreciated by all of us IT drones.

The IT lady remembered me from orientation, when I confessed to knowing computer stuff.

Preach it, brother!

"I used to work with computers and play with people. Now I do the opposite."

Well Done Wolf....

I prefer medium-rare wolf, myself.

Oh so clever.

Well, I can at least say I'm always fresh!

Congrats, Wolf. Sounds like you've landed nicely. You deserve it.

Worked the weekend, wasn't insanely busy, but wasn't totally quiet and boring.

Got to spend some quality time with hyperguy, actually getting a chance to talk. He's pretty cool. He spent some time showing me around parts of the department I hadn't really seen. There is an actual lab, with centrifuges, a biohazard fridge, a big-ass eyewash fountain, and everything.

I still want to be able to wander around the campus a bit. There are a lot of buildings and I'd like to have a better idea of what I'm sending people into.

I am seriously tired out.

I worked my regular shift last night (left at 2300) and had agreed to an OT shift in honor of the holiday weekend ... bossdude wanted double coverage on today.

Now I know why. The assistant to bossdude was in stupid early this morning and called everyone on the waiting list to come in to fill the place up.

I love the overtime, don't get me wrong, but the ass-busting work I had to do in order to earn it? Not so much. I was looking forward to a day of a couple of phone calls and setting things up for the evening people.

I ended up with a lot of phone calls, and a lobby full of junkies wondering why everything was taking so long.

Well, my cow orkers are starting to figure out that I know _everybody_.

One of them kindly offered to take me on a tour around the campus, show me what the units looked like, and so on. As we walked up to this one building, there were police cars out front. "Well that can't be good," she said.

As we walked up to the cop he said, "Hey what are you doing here?"

"I'm not there anymore, I'm here!"

Lots of smiling and handshaking.

As we walked away, she said, "That cop knows you?"

"yeah, I know all of them."

So, a couple of days ago, there's an incident in my department, cops are there again, and the sergeant is in the office taking a statement from somebody or another ... he interrupts his business to give me a big hug. I thought hyperguy's eyeballs would fall out he was bugging so much.

It's not just cops.

I had presented a case to one of the attendings, and was telling the other folks what was going on in case they got any calls about that patient coming in. I referred to the shrink the way I've always referred to him ... by his first name.

One of them said, wait, who is (firstnameredacted)?

The attending. That's his first name.

Oh, you call doctors by their first names? (Dr. Firstnameredacted is notoriously straightlaced, apparently. He's the one I was hugging in the hallway my second day there)

The one's that I have known for 15 years, yes.

I also know the majority of local people that refer to us, and, of course, everybody at the old nuthouse.

bossdude called me into his office yesterday, pointing out that my 90 day eval was coming up, and he wanted to talk with me a little bit.

He mentioned some areas where I had shown improvement, and was asking where I was having issues, usual boss stuff.

Then he mentioned that whole thing about my title being different from all the others (They are Admissions Officers, I am the Clinical Admissions Specialist) ... and how I'm going to be finding out what that entails, now that I know how to do the base job. I'm going to have responsibility for screening cases that are being presented by outside agencies.

He kept saying, "you're a master's level clinician." There were overtones of awe attached there.

You know, at the old nuthouse, nobody ever regarded me that way.

That's awesome! Way to go!

Respect. There is NO substitute!

Way to go, Wolf!

Most uncomfortable moment to date ... We had a TG male come in (f>m) who needed to be body searched and also monitored for a urine.

Everybody else in the office was in a tizzy over how do do the search. As low woman on the totem pole, it got handed to me. Hyperguy was all "how do you do with that?"

By not making it a big deal.

Went in with the young transman, explained the process, and started by saying, "So, are you wearing a binder or have you had top surgery already?"

Nothing like breaking the ice by cutting to the chase, and letting him know that I was cool with the deal, didn't really mind, and just wanted to get to business.

Awesome! Do I need to call you Ms. Master's Level Clinician now? ;)

Wolf it is sSO good to know you've landed where you're appreciated.
You RAWQK and we always knew it!

:thumb:

This pleases me, the respect shown here.
This makes me happy too (not that it wasn't said before, but that you're getting what you deserve now).

Is that like a Level 50 Clinician with +20 charisma and unlimited healing potions? Because that's how I'm imagining it. With a tasteful brown robe.

Well played, Wolf. That was the correct response.

<applause>

Mistress will do. Just like always.

More kudos, and from an unsolicited source ...

There are a couple of insurance companies that we deal with a lot, know the care managers by name, and often their personality quirks. So, anyway, I was doing a review to get our payment started, and this fellow says, "I recognize your voice, weren't you wolf from the nuthouse before you were wolf from the rehab?"

Yup.

"We were wondering what happened, all of a sudden you weren't calling any more."

yeah, well, it's a long story, but now I'm here and I'm not there.

"We're glad your back. I saw your name on the level of care evals and I was excited for you. You are highly regarded by us."

Damn. I'm just basking in this.

Oh, and I talked to a buddy from the nuthouse. He's a good guy, and totally not a political animal, even though he plays the game pretty well. He confirmed that the shrink's protected category trumped my protected category, and that the order came from on high for my summary execution.

This is doing wonders for my self esteem, I tell you.

I was thinking something more flowy, in jet black, but with that iridescent coating, you know? And a hood with purple and gold trim. I am an Olden Ram.

Yes mistress Wolf. :notworthy

And so, being low wolf on the totem pole, I worked Independence Day.

Now, having nearly 20 years of mental health experience, I know what holidays are supposed to be like. Kick back, answer a couple of phones, maybe see a drunken walk-in or two.

I was wrong.

An "enthusiastic" cow orker worked Tuesday and scheduled seven freaking people!

When I got in the day shift person was pulling her hair out, because most of them had shown up, and some guy walked in shortly after I arrived.

No problem. We worked through the overlap, had mostly everybody ready to see the doctor, and she left.

Yikers.

Me and a room full of mainly junkies.

Just kind of coasted through it, at least I was ahead of the doctor as far as having things ready to just bang into the computer and call the unit.

Then later, this dude shows up, and he's so unconscious he can't fill out the paperwork. Tried to get the doctor to see him, but he wouldn't see people out of order, and every time I got the doc up front to at least eyeball the dude to maybe send him to the ER ... he would rouse just enough to show he wasn't dead yet.

Doc, come on here, I learned medicine by watching ER ... I couldn't wake him up without a ton of yelling and shaking ...

So I texted boss-dude for guidance.

What happens? boss-dude texts back ... "I'll be in shortly."

I wasn't drowning or panicking, just wanting some leverage with the doc, boss-dude.

Oh, and to top it all off, the CEO called me ... she was on grounds?! What CEO comes in on a holiday???? She asked me a couple of questions on the phone, stuff that she probably had, not sure if she was testing me or what.

So, boss-dude did come in, made a couple of insurance company phone calls, and noted that I wasn't overwhelmed by the activity. He told me to clean up what I was working on, and then I could go (so I got overtime on my holiday time).

He also asked me if i could work Friday.

I was supposed to be off on Friday and Saturday, I already agreed to work on Sunday, which was also supposed to be an off day. So I told him, "Well, I'm still waiting for you to complete my 90-day probation review, so suck-up mode is still in effect. I was going to go camping, but if you really need me ..."

He said he'd figure something else out, because I deserved to go camping.

Now, he doesn't know how I feel about camping. And bugs. And the wilderness. So I MAY go in there today and tell him how I've seen the weather report, and if I HAVE to work, that could provide a graceful out for me. I especially don't like camping in over 100 degree temperatures. It's not like I can just go down to the hotel-on-wheels and stay in the air conditioning. I would actually have to tend fire and be out in the heat and everything.

So, I get the last guy out of the lobby, and I'm all ready to leave, and ... seriously drunk chick and boyfriend stumble in.

Seriously drunk chick has a bottle of beer, which I took from her. She spent the rest of our time together saying, "You took my beer."

yes, I did.

"Can i have my beer back?"

No, nice try, though.

It never got old for her. We must have done that same routine another six or seven times before I got her far enough along in the process to be able to hand her off to the nursing supervisor. I then beat feet out of there.

Maybe you need to make Doc a night's reservation at the nearest Holiday Inn.
.

Not too many things in life feel better than vindication.

I can totally see the fun in doing that dialog multiple times.

I might've been tempted to switch it up, though, and start responding in nonsense from time to time.

I promised to use my superpowers only for the forces of goodness.

Oh, hell. You can tell a drunk anything and 5 minutes later they've forgotten it. When I was still at the Bates a drunk would come in and I'd tell him, "Sorry, we don't rent out rooms to anyone who is intoxicated." 15 minutes later he'd be back hoping I'd changed my mind or that someone else would be out front. Or he just forgot that he tried there already.

I couldn't do your job in a million years, Wolf. I'd go postal by time I'd encountered the 10th or 11th drunk. Having been one myself, I have no patience with active drinkers.

The drunks, unless they are angry drunks, are always better than the junkies.

You can leave a drunk alone at your desk for thirty seconds.

So, I went into boss-dude's office yesterday evening, and said, "So, about my 90 day eval ... you see, I really need new eyeglasses and I haven't gotten an email from HR about filling out all the forms for the insurance coverage and stuff, and, well, i was worried ..."

Boss-dude laughed and said, "You're off probation. I just haven't gotten around to the eval. You don't have to worry. I'm not firing you."

"Phew."

He immediately sent an email to HR to ask about by benefits stuff, and I had an answer back in less than ten minutes. How about that?

You can't blame me for being gun-shy here. I did my last job perfectly for 19 years and got shit-canned for something I didn't do, after all.

relax.

that just means you have 18.75 years to go, right?

I have promised to teach quietgirl how I work my magick with insurance companies. I don't actually know how I manage to get them to agree to pay for some of the most awfully poor clinically supported admissions, but I usually do. I know at least some of it has to do with what I call "the shmooze."

I rarely get full-out denials of care. Sometimes, you can't help it, because most care managers won't or aren't allowed to see past the criteria they work with, but some of them become more willing to do so if they like you. Most of the time if I can get a giggle out of them, I can get money out of them.

I shall teach the young padawan-learner, if I can figure out how I do it.

She was also talking about her embarrassment related to the usual insurance company question of "and what are your creditials?" She has a high school diploma, and, despite being very good at her job, gets thrown by this question because she hasn't got an advanced degree.

I am making her a certificate. It is very fancy, and declares that she is to be entitled to and accorded all of the rights and privileges of having conferred upon her the status of "NOOAI."

A presenter at a conference I went to had this after his name on his title card of his powerpoint. He was a cop. A good cop, but a cop. Academy graduate, but not a college guy.

He clued us in to the meaning near the end of the conference ... "No One Of Any Importance." Everybody else presenting was a PhD or LCSW or MD, and he wanted to have some letters too.

I hope that this does not backfire and hit her right in her self-esteem issues. She does have a pretty good sense of humor, though. She carries a Spongebob messenger bag and on dress-down days has been known to wear Spongebob flannel jammie pants and UGG-like slippers, because they are comfy.

Risky. The act of analysing your technique might make you start overthinking it and ruin your effectiveness. Happened to a golf player once, decades ago. Best golfer in the world, tried to write a book about it, thought about it so much he lost his game and never got it back.

Oh and you'd be less indispensable. You want that?

duuuuuude.

No one is indispensble. That's an unhelpful myth.

He didn't say she was. He just said she's become less so.....

To be truly indispensible, you need to be unique in your entire field. Create your own job that no-one else could do. Because if there are two of you, s/he could take your job. Sure, maybe you'd get theirs. Or maybe they'd train someone before they jumped. But if it's just you... and just one job ....where would you go if you left? They don't need to treat you well, they know you are stuck.

/twosidestoeverycoin

If you are indispensable, you can never take a vacation.

Well, fine.
then it's a dumb remark, like "more unique". You can't put such a limiting qualifier on a absolute like "indispensable".

...

on top of that, he even got it upside down (maybe it's a southern hemisphere thing.) If indispensable is good, wouldn't you want to be more of it and not less of it?

The Rehab is part of this fitness thing, it's sponsored through the American Cancer Society.

I signed up for it.

I am stupid.

Okay, I'm not stupid.

My purpose was to suck up to the boss-dude.

See, he's a team captain.

So I signed up and get an email back ... Too many people on boss-dude's team, so I get assigned elsewhere.

Crap.

Now I'm committed and I'm in direct competition with boss-dude and most of my cow orkers.

So yeah, I guess I am stupid.

But anyway, I told HR that was fine, and it would be a good way to meet more people. Sucking up to HR can't hurt, right?

In an odd twist of fate, my team captain is the former director of my department.

They wanted to name our team "Boss-Dude's Worst Enemy." This did not win in the voting. We are "The Avengers."

So, here I am, day two. I committed to 29 minute per day (that's considered "Bronze" level).

Both yesterday and today I did manage to go walking, each time for at least 45 minutes. Starting at the Rehab kind of got me out of doing this, because back when I first got shitcanned, and before crazynurse got sick, I was walking nearly every day.

On the upside, I'm getting back to listening to The Making of the Atomic Bomb. I'm getting near the end.

I have to figure out what to listen to next.

So the security guard, the one who bows to me and calls me his goddess ... he comes into the office last night, with a carefully wrapped package in his hands. He says, "Goddess wolf, don't touch this without gloves, but we got to put this away."

"What is it?"

"It's a cell phone. it's wrapped in plastic, and I have two pairs of gloves around it too."

"Why?"

"One of the patients had it on the unit. She was hiding it."

"So, why is it ... oh. was she hiding it in a special place?"

"Yes." (I think he was grateful that I caught on so quickly)

"Did she have it on vibrate?"

The man laughs just like Jeffrey Holder.

The rest of the night he would come by and say ... "Call me."

Are you SUUURE he really works there??? LOL

This is not my story, but it deserves to be told.

One of my nurses, back when she was a young nurse, worked in a dementia unit somewhere.

For reasons that are unclear, the unit had an open nurses station, which means there is not a locked door between the nurses and the patients.

So anyway, this young nurse is also a young mother. She had just started back to work after giving birth, and had to pump her breast milk several times a day. She put it in a container and put that container into the refrigerator.

Well, one day, she sees one of the demented old ladies walking down the hall with her special tupperware container. And a milk mustache.

She lost it. Put her right over the edge into post partum depression. Her nurse manager had to send her home.

and people have been milking that story ever since.

A bit of a workplace crush then? That's about like finding a Hello Kitty lunchbox -- that's ticking. Kinda cute, but probably dangerous.

OR, they could turn out to be the love of each other's lives.:eyebrow:

The other night was busy. Kind of average busy. At the beginning of the shift we were all present and accounted for, but after a while, somebody noticed that hyperguy was missing. He has this tendency to wander, so we didn't think much of it. No sign of him by the end of the shift ... which is when the night coverage came in. Night coverage was bossdude's assistant ... after she settles in she says, "hyperdude is no longer employed by this facility. I can't say anything more than that."

On the upside, I now have a desk of my own.

Oh, and bossdude is on vacation. I am unused to anything like this happening when the boss is on vacation.

I am curious as to what hyperguy did ... both out of basic curiosity and in wanting to know what one shouldn't do if one is wanting to remain employed.

I have my suspicions, which if true, means I am absolutely no danger of being escorted out under similar circumstances.