So how do you know my husband?

You wanna' try this thing I read about on this one website?

hey, what are you meant to do after you pull the pin?

Legal Dept.: Councillor Coombs, any chance you could pop into the office for a few minutes?

Do you know anything about this federal warrant?

Who left the scalpel in Mr. Johnson?

Why is there a lung in the lunch room?

Why is your mother emailing naked pictures of herself to the shift supervisor?

Who's been drinking from this cup marked "formaldehyde"?

Do you have papers for all these Spics?:eek:

what's a spic?

You don't want your free lifetime supply of Coors Light?

Did you mail in the taxes?

How much do we owe??

Does this coffee taste anthraxy to you? (with apologies to the Onion)

It's a racist term for hispanic. I was referencing the other thread where folks who say they oppose national identity cards are saying they want to mandate landlords checking citizenship. Sometimes I'm not gentle when pointing out hypocrisy.

Is anyone here a pilot?

i think they would know about it pretty damn quick. "he's been fixed!"

Nice!

-----

Who's pregnancy test is this?

Who's panties are these?

Where did all this blood come from?

You've done this before right?

How come there's no chicks in this bar?

What could go wrong?

Honey, you're home?

It won't come out?!

Why am I standing here in the middle of a village in Uzbekistan, stark naked with a sore butt and a bad hangover?

When are you due?

Do you smell dog poop?

Who's piece of crap car is that across the street?

Do you want fries with that?

You've never had sex with an animal?

Do you know what it feels like to have your dick chopped off?

Will you bend over a little further?

That was your pussy, wasn't it?

How long have you been standing there?

:eek:

Who are you and what have you done with Spexxvet? ;)

Too much coffee. :morncoff: :devil:

Hell, I need some of that coffee! Mine has nowhere near the aphrodisiacal effects that yours has! :blush:

WHY-O-WHY WONT U ANSER UR FONE!!!???

CUZ UR STALKERING ME

Y, R U SO GHEY?

Y-0-Y wnt u ansr ur fone?

:lol:

OMG that is some funny shit.

It happens to everyone, you sure bout' that?

Why is it moving?

Is she breathing?

You like it how?

has anyone seen my std?

I need an address to send the keyboard cleaning bill to :)

What did you do with insurance money and SBA loan?

Who drove the Rexton last???

Does that feel right to you?

Is this lump normal?

phone rings...after 2 rings I pick up.

Eddie Griffin: "Yo, Guyute, that Ferrari you lent me- were you covered for others driving it?"

In job interviews:

Can you recall a time when you....<enter heroic situation here>...?

Why did you leave your last job?

What are the answers to those questions case?


Or is that not allowed??.. I dont remember the rules

I hate that question! Do they want you to be tactful, or honest?? Then of course, your day is ruined wondering which one it was. I also hate:

Are you willing to work overtime?

Evil fuckers.

can i show you where the male G-spot is?

Where do you see yourself in five years?

Why did you leave your last job?

Ooooh. That can be an uncomfortable question. Assuming you've nothing ... actionable to hide, tell the truth. Look, the person asking the question knows you've parted ways with the last company. Everybody knows that. And everybody knows that had things been just peachy keen, you'd still be there. This answer has some... what ... difficult news in it, news that there was a disagreement between you and your former employer. There's no hiding it. So now that the "secret" is "out" you can quit sweating it.

Think about this too: the interviewer probably wants to hire you. They're at least hopeful that you'll be "the one". They want to hear your answer in a positive light. They want the old company's loss to be their gain. There are ways, acceptable, ethical ways to phrase the reason(s) for your departure.

One emphasis I like to make is "It was a mutual decision. They wanted more X and I wanted more Y (where Y is strikingly similar to the situation I'm applying for, not coincidentally)." If it was a "layoff" I include the company's financial reasons--implicate them and their responsibility for the change. It's important not to badmouth the old company. It's also important not to overtalk this on. Quick and to the point and then shut up and let the interviewer move on.

This can be a difficult question, but it can also present a big opportunity for you to impress the interviewer with your positive potential. It has downside risks too--most especially if you lie. Don't lie. I know you knew that already, really. Tell the truth in a favorable way to your receptive listener, don't worry, and then move on.

I've answered this question a lot of times, and though uncomfortable, it's not fatal. If the interviewer doesn't want to accept that you've lost a job in the past, you probably don't want to work for them anyway.

My ex b/f had a job interview this morning. He was fretting about that "why did you leave" question. He was honest the last time and it didn't help him out. You just never know. I was coaching him last night...you know "make eye contact, be sincere, you don't want to say your old boss was a stupid fucking man-billy dyke whore tobacco spittin' cunt." But she was.

I hope it went well.

It's a standard application form question in the UK
The NHS application form asks it for every employer you have had. Waste of space asking someone why they left a job back in 1988 imo. It's not like they'd check back further than 2 jobs anyway so why bother asking?

Luckily the next time I am asked this my answer will be "relocation"

So ex b/f went into the place, introduced himself, and said he was there for a job interview. They put him into an orientation. He starts Sunday Night (3rd shift.) I'm happy for him because I know he'll feel much better, and happy for me because I'm hoping I'll get some of the money he owes me. :)

Yay! Congrats to Shawn (and yes - here's hoping it benefits you too)

I think he owes me a dinner when he gets paid. :)

They couldn't keep up with me.

I like to answer that question with:

"Because the security guard said I should."

I hate the first one worse, though, where the interviewer asks about examples of when you were uber-worker.