lol...wanna see my twat noodle?

The ULTIMATE Question

OMG. :rotflol:

I like 'athletic' backsides.

Twat???
 

I wasn't clear on what the actually meaning of "twat" was...so I tried to
google it to get a clear definition.
That didn't help me any...so I dogpiled it...I had to confirm that I was 18; but now I know...

You have a twat noodle? What the hell is a twat noodle?

Twat? I cunt hear you. I have an infuction in my ear and I cunt finger out what you're saying.

If you go to the dickter, he can give you some penisillin.


Aliantha: gmail in profile

OMG spex...I can't believe you used the C word! Umaaaa!!! Here I was thinking I was stetching the boundaries. You just went ahead and smashed right through them. lol Good work! BTW...I don't know what a twat noodle is, but maybe it's got something to do with not trimming the dangly ones?

noodle, was that a yes or no?

ahem

pssssst Ali....are you like, trying to help a fellow aussie out....or cut my lunch??

just so I know before I turn all buddug on ya :p

lol...well he's not going to say yes for starters. For seconds, that pic got deleted ages ago and for thirds, I'm just being a stirer. Noodle isn't my type...plus, I'm a happily married woman. ;)

How's that for a defense? lol

btw...do you know what gmail in profile means?

muahaha ya dork...his gmail address is in his profile I'm tipping.

Ohhh, I thought you might of been dangling the bait to get him down here so i can try my hand at the corruption bit.

lol...well I still have pics of my tits here somewhere if you want me to, but I'm pretty sure you could do that yourself. ;)

"gmail in profile" is an internetism for "send boobies". I think it's from fark.com, but I haven't been a member there for awhile, so I might be misremembering.

Anyway the point is that I was giving you permission to send pictures. Of anything that you don't mind being posted on the internet for profit.

Corrupt me? lol. I'll make you famous.

Or maybe I'll quietly fap to them, or maybe I'll send you bible verses. I'm some guy from the internet, who can say?

:heartpump


On a completely different subject, someone on the news just pronounced the name of the British car company as "Jagwire". :behead:

But doesn't your morality barometer preclude the viewing of such lascivious material?

ohh shit, I hope not....


if it does, DELETE THE EMAIL!!!!

Yes. To be 100 percent sincerely honest, as I always try to be on the cellar (this isn't just any forum), here is my inner dialogue:

1. lol, twat pics
2. lol, i should let them corrupt me -- free pussy, right?
3. I'm not setting an example of how Christ would do this. sigh. I'll defuse the situation with humor.
4. Hell, if they wanna send em, let em come. I can decide to not look at them later, if that's the mood I'm in at the time. Which I won't be, because I always look at genitals when given the chance.
5. The next opportunity to do the right thing will be when someone does the next round of "oh but you're so moral, you can't look at em" saw.
6. So no, I don't want to look at your bearded clam, unless it provides some entertainment value above and beyond that of the 40-odd I've seen personally.
7. Now you're being caustic, which is also not a good way to present yourself as a believer. It's also rather self-conscious sounding and mean.
8. Time for the absolute truth:

Yah, you can send them if you like. I'll probably look at em, find them arousing or funny or whatever they incite in me. I will keep them for a week, then shake my head at my weakness when it comes to sexual stuff and delete it, and ask God to help me be a better example of what it means to believe what I believe.


Now, then. There's the whole mystery of me, summed up in a few neat phrases. That takes away from the fun, unfortunately, but it will save you a couple rounds of "lol christians" to use later. :p


edit: if i'm having a day where i'm not on my toes morally, i might hit on you and figure out a time/method by which i could put it in your butt. THAT one always makes me feel great about my morality :D

Well if I did send you rude pics - which I can't really anyway cause as I said, I don't have any anymore - I'd have to face the wrath of Ducks, which I predict could be painful.

So, thanks for all that nice stuff (honesty) but today is not going to be your lucky day. ;) I think we all know I was just taking the piss anyway.

Some people may call me morally bankrupt I suppose, but personally, I don't see anything wrong with a naked body or pics. It's how I came into the world, and I had an audience then too, but I respect your views and will try harder not to taunt you in the future. :)

lol Aliantha, we're the only ones in here......


wink wink

send me nude pics of ducks then

lol...I don't have any, but I'm sure she would send them if she thought you were serious...which she may after seeing your last post.

I'll accept any pics of naked ladies. Unluck Noodle, I will cherish them for all eternity. Also unlike Noodle, I've been married for 20 years, I'm not in a band, and I don't have that much hair, that makes me safe and desperate.

I'll accept any pics of naked ladies too...I know that I can deal them at the local middle school.

EDIT: Along with any drugs you send me.

:eyebrow:

Moi?? send naked pics??....I wouldnt ever

Oh hold on, I did say i was going to post my arse pic huh?

Hey Ali, you might have naked pics in a months time ;)


forgot - morethanpretty...do I get royalities???

How about this one: Too big? Too small? Does it look firm? Would you want to squeeze it if it was in front of you in the lunchline?

If I were behind you in line - I'd be bumping into you repeatedly ;)

Wouldn't touch it....but I'd be gawkin' and droolin' and probably have my hand in my pocket. :drool:

You wouldn't be in the lunch line much longer...

Not nearly as nice as labrat's...but I felt that I need to follow her example.

Shouldv'e known my arse would shock ppl into non-responsiveness. I know I know its flabby.

Silly goose, its not a flabby arse.

If I happened to be into female butts, I would definitely comment that you had a hot arse and do the drooly smiley ;)

I'm like male arses, but I am happy to say you have a nice arse for a fellow chick

I was gone, but rock on! It's all about the asstitude. ;) OK, whose next?

MTP, you've got one of those nice, high-set back porches, perched up on top of the legs, making them look longer than normal.

I'd grab it.

9 out of 10 guys like women with big butts, and the 10th guy likes the other 9 guys

:lol2:

I wish...I'm only 5'2" (I like being short) and my body is best describes as being squat.

I thought that it was actually 8 out of 10 guys who like big butts, and the
9th and 10th like each other...

well crap - no wonder my arse isnt getting any action

Thats because you keep it down under

So am I. My inseam is 29". I have to buy 'short' or 'ankle' length jeans or I look like I raided my big sister's closet. The trick is to wear shoes with a thick heel, and absolutely NO bell-bottomish jeans, or you look like a walking house of mirrors trick. Bootcut are great, especially with a heeled shoe or boot. Totally lengthens your leg.

Also, my absolute favorite 2 styles of jeans are Polo "Saturday" style (which they don't make any F-ing more because Ralphie quit selling in the US) or Tommy Hilfiger 'Boyfriend' style. The latter comes in 'ankle' length, and the fit is both confortable and flattering. Normally $60, but go on sale for as low as $40, plus if you have a Younkers around you, they always have coupons for additional $$ off. I got 2 pairs of TH 'boyfriend's for $32 each a couple weeks ago.

long legs, short legs....once they go pasted my ears, I don't care how far they go. :blush:

yeah! younkers. lovd that place. worked there for quite awhile until the loser security guard became very very afraid of me after i made certain promises to him after he held my very scared very 16 year old sister in a locked room bullying her.

What the heck was he bullying her for?

she was a sales clerk, and i had her ring out some stuff for me. i worked at night unloading semi's. perfectly legit, receipt to match... he didn't like me and took her in and accused her of stealing stuff, threatened her with arrest for theft unless she told them that i did it. kept her for several hours. she called me after they finally let her go and told me about it. i went down there with the receipt and called the store manager, the HR manager, and showed them the receipt so they thought the situation was settled. i told them it was just getting started. they had two choices, either they put out a formal apology stating that the security guard was an asshat and my sister did nothing wrong or i would end his career. they laughed at me and told me to leave.

two weeks later the security guard was mysteriously arrested after they received a tip that he was stealing things. he was so confident that he let them search his car... til they found a case of ralph lauren stuff in his trunk.

dumb bastard, picking on a little girl to feel tough...

*should also point out that he didn't like me because i removed him from the bar i worked at for being offensive. he got stupid and ended up embarrassing himself and his friends.

That's what I'm talkin' 'bout! (Is that another American-ism?)

How could I leave this... Behind?

Bump for Cloud

According to Desmond Morris, they do.