I've seriously thought of doing this with FA stories, too.

My ex sis-in-law, years ago on staff for a congressman, had a collection of nut letters. I told her she should publish but apparently that is a big giant no-no. I guess you could make the stories really anonymous, but said nuts would find themselves in every story and sue.

Last night was horrifyingly busy. I should have spent the night watching the snow fall and posting on The Cellar, but instead I was running from start to finish. The only way I got to eat dinner was that I had to do an insurance precertification call that kept me at my desk for a half-hour.

So, anyway, that guy came in ... you know, the Catcher in the Rye nut?

The homeless shelter director was in our office filing a commitment petition on a different guy ... she saw him, and gave some helpful information to our doctor ... "He's evil. I don't care that it's Code Blue. He's not allowed to set foot in our shelter."

His reputation is well known.

How do you take someone seriously that has beautiful penmanship, but writes that someone has "visiable abortions on her arms and wrests," "her momma is a crack," and "she wants to died."

Nut: Do I have to have sex for cigarettes? Should I call a hooker?

(not only does she realize that she should offer a trade for cigarettes, but she understands that she is not herself able to provide value for your money, and is willing to hire a subcontractor)

Nut: is the doctor there?

wolf: no, she isn't. She's gone for the day. Sorry to surprise you, but our doctors do go home on occasion.

Nut: Well, she discharged me a couple of weeks ago and she forgot to give me my medications.

wolf: What medications might those be? (I had a pretty good idea. our doctors do not typically prescribe medications that are considered "fun.")

Nut: My Benzos. (bingo. fun as fun can be.)

wolf: We don't write for benzos on discharge. You need to discuss that with your outpatient doctor. (probably already did, and outpatient shrink also has a policy of not prescribing anything fun)

Nut: But it's my birthday weekend coming up and I need my benzos! (great, now they're using us to cater their birthday parties)

And so, I thought the adventure was ended ... until the police showed up with her.

The police thought she wanted to see the doctor. I knew better.

wolf: So, do you think you need to be in the nuthouse?

Nut: oh, no. I don't need to be in, I just need my benzos. It's my birthday weekend coming up.

wolf: I'm the one you talked to on the phone. You're not getting any benzos.

Nut: oh. Well, I got a complaint. You're making milk come out my nipples. (the policemen were both choking in an attempt not to laugh)

wolf: That's a medical problem. You need to see your primary doctor.

Nut: Will my primary write me benzos?

wolf: You'll have to talk to him about that.

She then decided she was done with me, and asked the police to take her to her mother's residence.

Cop: You got two choices, you can stay here voluntarily and see the doctor, or you can go to jail.

Nut turned her back to the cops, crossed her arms behind her back and announced, "Jail."

and off they went into the night.

I have never seen anything quite like it.

Anything to say or would that not be cool?

I came across a few of these folks while doing patient transport, though I didn't have any issues with them.

Not sure why this thread has revived now, but folks like this are routine in my experience. What's the question?

ortho - we have figured you out. you probably prescribe maple syrup for everything.

Natch, maple syrup cures most things ...

I revived it because for the first time NPR has reported on someone defending his own and the lives of others with a gun. That person is a doctor who works in a nuthouse local to our resident wrangler.

It's unusual to see the news industry report on those occurrences. They generally practice the biases of their sources of revenue. Occasionally there's a spin they can use such as a doctor saving lives in an unconventional manner; or, a veteran continuing to do at home what he was trained to do in the military as in this story:

Veteran With Concealed Carry Permit Shoots Back At Chicago Gunman

From UT's link. The Doctor was stone lucky, he needs better training.

is that Canadian for Windex?