I'm not the magic 8 ball, but house prices are down, and it's a good time to be a buyer rather than a seller. Assuming you can get a loan.

The Chicago Tribune knows Pie?

PETA uses "Ethical" in two different ways. When referring to the actions of medical researchers, meat industry, and pet owners, they use a Natural Law standard which applies value to all beings capable of sentience, and no beneficial outcome can triumph that inherent value.

For their own actions, however, they use the a utilitarian standard; the ends justify the means, and a good enough ends justifies any means.

They have this double standard in common with all fundamentalists and ideologues.

The judgments of TM8B are in no way compromised by the use of mind-altering drugs, and I resent the insinuation otherwise, brah.

Upon McCains death (early 2010), Palin will be the female president sworn in. She will neglect the duties of the presidency, however, to focus on a reading tour of her poetry:

“You Can’t Blink”

You can’t blink.
You have to be wired
In a way of being
So committed to the mission,

The mission that we’re on,
Reform of this country,
And victory in the war,
You can’t blink.

So I didn’t blink.

(To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept. 11, 2008)
(link)

As long both major parties run on the platform of "Government will fix this for you", each new generation will grow up with an increasing expectation that this is so.

What, you thought TM8B was just jackin' with you? This shit is real, man, totally real.

Oh wow, the colors. The colors. Dude, what was in that pie, man?

Soy. I put soy in your chilli. Didn't you ask for a soy chilli latte?

And the gov't time on said projects is billable. Let's not forget. :)

If you plan to live in the house for 10 years, then yes, go ahead and buy it. If you're going to live there for 5 years, do not buy it. Somewhere in between, shake the ball and try again.

GENTLY, damn it, shake me GENTLY. My god, you people are uncouth.

Dear Mr Ball,

Please forgive them. They have no knowledge of your inner workings, of the smooth viscosity through which your finely angled answers come. Education, my friend. Do you have any links to 8-ball autopsies?

Thank you,

Speaker of the Masses

I don't know why you would want such a thing, other than pure voyeuristic ghoulishness, but here you are.

Oh god, the horror. They didn't even properly anesthetize the ball ahead of time

OMG the horror!

Seriously, how funny is it that you found that? I love the interwebz.

from the link -
Here comes PETA!

Magic 8 ball, are you threatened by Ouija board practitioners?

Decidedly so.