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-   -   Weird News (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=16997)

infinite monkey 02-24-2012 01:17 PM

I had a hot tub
But I left it all behind
With the house and the yard
Got soakin' on my mind.

My new song for (oh hell, what's her dumb name?OH...) Shania Twain

monster 02-24-2012 01:42 PM

Need to soak that man outta my skin
Need a new tub with some bubbles in....

monster 02-24-2012 01:42 PM

*at this point the cat starts howling along....*

infinite monkey 02-24-2012 01:49 PM

It's like musical day, because you 'minded me of another favorite of mine

I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair...

If his eyes get dull and fishy,
When you look for glints and gleams,
Waste no time,
Make a switch,
Drop him in the nearest ditch!
Rub him out of the roll call,
And drum him out of your dreams
Oho! Oho!

Sundae 02-24-2012 02:14 PM

Don't know if anyone else remembers No More Lonely Nights (Sir Paul McCartney)
I dedicate this song to Infi.
And Dennis Nilsen.

I can wait another day until I flush you
I've only got your heart in my sink and kidneys in my gutter
But another carving night (and another and another)
Might take forever
I only have a single candle flame
It's all the same to you love
Now you know, what it means, to feel fright

No more lonely nights, never be another
No more lonely nights
Got you sealed in tight
Day or night you're always there

monster 02-24-2012 02:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey (Post 797565)
I had a hot tub
But I left it all behind
With the house and the yard
Got soakin' on my mind.

My new song for (oh hell, what's her dumb name?OH...) Shania Twain

and here's one for Bieber:

When I was just twenty three
The hot tub fairy came to me
oooooooooh.

infinite monkey 02-24-2012 03:22 PM

When I first saw the story about the news anchor who was bit in the face by a mastiff I thought "don't put your face in an unknown dog's face" but I know I'd likely do the same thing...he seemed to enjoy being petted, seemed content.

What I like about this story is the woman holds no animosity towards the animal. She calls it an accident, is happy the dog is home with its owners, and just wants to move on.

That right there is one classy lady.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/465118...er-blamed-dog/

Sundae 02-24-2012 03:36 PM

Sorry, complete opposite reaction.
Dangerous animal. If it can injure that much, that quickly, it might do so again.
She's like a beaten wife who thinks it's all her fault.

Obviously God saved her this time, but we know God has a shaky track record on consistency.

monster 02-24-2012 03:42 PM

I'm sure she feels eactly how her publicist tells her she should........ :right:

infinite monkey 02-24-2012 03:45 PM

Yeah, well, naysayers. Here's my take:

1) Dangerous dog? Perhaps. I have made my opinion of some breeds known. The dog didn't chase her down and bite her face off. She made an error. A scared dog, even yappy little snot nosed ones, will bite your face off. I'm more scared of a snappy little chi-hoo-ah-hoo-ah I once knew.

2) Her faith in god? What the fuck do I care? That negates the fact that she is a positive person who chose to let this go? Not prima donna (ring a bell?) her way around shouting about her face (like so many tv personalities would) and demanding dog death.

3) Meh. Bitter is bitter. Batter is better. Butter fucking in the mouth is best.

4) Bite me. See what I did thar?

plthijinx 03-03-2012 11:22 AM

ok. this story made me say "What?!?! THE Fuck?!?!?!?" not only did this idiot jump once and fail? (from the second story mind you....) he did it again! and failed. then the cops show up and tazed then he died. guess he got what he wanted. a ticket to eternal nap time. sheeze.

moron

Quote:

The newspaper had previously reported that Allen jumped twice from a motel’s second story balcony Monday and had been in critical condition.

BigV 03-03-2012 11:47 AM

Please. Someone help me. I watched this video, and now I can't find my brain.


plthijinx 03-03-2012 12:22 PM

um Coriolis effect? this guy's just trying to stir the pot. i'm only 5 mins into this but am watching the rest.

ETA: interesting. took me back to my glory days of racing motocross & supercross, my love of aviation (the guy flying the helo was damn good with his stunts), but wow. yeah, V, i think my brain is lost too.

GunMaster357 03-03-2012 01:21 PM

I suppose that telling that guy that the first scientist to demonstrate Earth's rotation was Jean Bernard Léon Foucault, a French scientist, in 1851 is only going to add fuel to the fire...

BigV 03-03-2012 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GunMaster357 (Post 799200)
I suppose that telling that guy that the first scientist to demonstrate Earth's rotation was Jean Bernard Léon Foucault, a French scientist, in 1851 is only going to add fuel to the fire...

There is no French in the Bible so SHUT UP!


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